Would have been our 4 year anniversary

Today would have been a celebration of my boyfriend and I being together for 4 years. However we broke up a few months ago, this was completely his choice and came very out of the blue. We were very happy and had amazing times together which he says too, however he says he isnt ready to commit or love and isnt sure if he ever can. I knew he had issues with trust and fully opening up but I never thought it would come to that as wed always talk about things as if wed always be together. We still talk everyday, some days more often and he still asks what Im doing and how my day has been. He still tells me things happening in his life, we share a few jokes. The other day he told me he still of course has feelings for me and they wouldnt go even in a year but he just doesnt feel ready. Unfortunately his way of coping has always been to isolate himself and push anyone away by making himself over busy, so he hasnt really given himself time to think about things or how he can overcome these problems and fears. Its also really difficult as Im still very confused, I understand where he is coming from and have said Ill support him no matter what but Im unsure as to whether our relationship is completely closed to him or if its something he would want to pick up again once his read was in the right place. As we had good foundations and the potential to be really strong and happy.

What do you guys think?

@Lmc101

Hey there, hopefully you are doing well. Theres a few things I would like to point out;

Today would have been a celebration of my boyfriend and I being together for 4 years. However we broke up a few months ago, this was completely his choice and came very out of the blue. (Usually when its very out of the blue means he has thought about it for awhile, and kept things that bothered him inside for a very long time) We were very happy and had amazing times together we he says too, however he says he isnt ready to commit or love and isnt sure if he ever can. (These kind of people are always unsure about things, attempting to have a future with someone like this will only lead to uncertainty and hurt) I knew he had issues with trust (This tells me he would keep people at arm length and won't be able to attach to people properly because he fears getting hurt) and fully opening up (He will keep things inside for the longest and the boom explode, this would cause major problems in any kind of relationship) but I never thought it would come to that as wed always talk about things as if wed always be together. (I understand how you feel, he just didn't share certain things) We still talk everyday, some days more often and he still asks what Im doing and how my day has been. (This feels too much like a friendship, he breakup with you, but still want you in his life. It's not a good position to be in because this only helps him move on) He still tells me things happening in his life, we share a few jokes. The other day he told me he still of course has feelings for me and they wouldnt go even in a year but he just doesnt feel ready. (He was very inappropiate in telling you he has feelings for you because it would cause your hope to go up, its very important to not put your life on hold for someone who you don't know when he will be ready) Unfortunately his way of coping has always been to isolate himself and push anyway away by making himself over busy, (He tends to push things under the rug, ignore what goes inside of him and then distract himself with getting busy. The problem with this is that things never get resolved with him, and then he will often be lonely and depressed) so he hasnt really given himself to think about things or how he can overcome these problems and fears. (He just ignores it which is why he won't overcome them) Its also really difficult as Im still very confused, I understand where he is coming from and have said Ill support him no matter what (I wouldn't do this because theres need to a period of no contact because he isn't sure about things) but Im confused as to whether our relationship is completely closed to him or if its something he would want to pick up again once his read was in the right place. (Being in contact with him and acting like a friend after he broke up with you will not make him think about this because he knows you will always be there to support him, so why he would want to turn it into a relationship when he has everything without the label?) As we had good foundations and the potential to be really strong and happy. (I don't think so, because his issues regarding isolating himself, push and pull, pushing things under the rug, and many other issues will cause you to be unhappy and disconnected in the relationsip. The issues he has is something you should really consider if it worth being in a relationship with him)