should i apologize
so a little over two years ago i was dating this guy and i really liked him and he treated me better than i deserved at the time. however we got into a fight because i wasn’t putting in enough effort which at the time i felt like wasn’t true but now i know it was. anyway he confronted me about it and it totally broke my heart because i cared about him i just didn’t know how to show it so when he was saying these things it hurt. he wasn’t perfect and said some very hurtful things during that time but i know it was out of hurt. we broke up and haven’t said a word to each other since. but i’ve grown as a person and realize that i was also in the wrong and feel bad for the way i treated him. i know it hurt him and he probably resents me but part of me just misses talking to him everyday and i want to apologize. should i apologize or should i just move on from it
@blueAcai6270
That makes sense. 💜 There is a guy who you used to date, and you fought at the time because he felt like you weren't putting enough effort into the relationship. At the time it really hurt you to hear that, but in hindsight you feel like some of his feelings/complaints might have been valid. (He wasn't perfect and hurt you as well, but you're able to accept that it was because he was unhappy.) In the present, you're wondering whether it makes sense to reach out to him and apologize, since you miss talking with him and you also feel badly about hurting him and want to make amends.
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I can't say for sure what you should do or whether it will go well. 😊 Personally, I've actually done what you're describing (i.e. reaching out to an ex and apologizing for past actions), and at least in my own case I felt like it helped me get some closure and alleviate some of my own guilt. The interactions years later also helped me understand/accept that the collapse of the relationship wasn't 100% my fault and a primary factor was some basic compatibility issues and value differences that weren't anybody's fault.
Here's a resource I was able to find that has some tips related to reaching out to an ex:
https://www.mindbodygreen.com/0-22779/6-dos-donts-of-reaching-out-to-an-ex.html