Trying to rebuild trust
My husband has lied to me a lot over the course of our relationship of only 3 years. He lied in the beginning about his sexual health and gave me a STD. He lied about when he divorced his ex. He broke boundaries about connecting exes. He never stuck to boundaries he laid down with people. He claimed to share the same values as me, as it was important to me prior to marriage. To find out I was led on to believe it in order to marry him.
He has a history of not being transparent. My trust in him is pretty much non-existent. We have had serious talk and I know he loves me. And we are working on rebuilding the trust and so far he is following through. But it so hard. Sometimes I wonder if it's worth it. Little things will trigger me and I am trying to process the betrayals and heal internally as well.
@persistentSouth7938 people have a tendency of showing who they are from the get-go, it's better to trust he's going to lie than to trust him to be someone he's not
whether it's worth it will always be up to you- i think the bigger question is can you love him for who he is rather than who you want him to be? If he's causing you more trouble than it's worth, then have no doubt that there's always something different right around the corner. There's no use using your time and energy towards something that you don't want.
@persistentSouth7938
If he loves you and wants to be married why lie.... it will come out trust is hard to rebuild if it was so easy to lie about who he was / is. many issues happen in a marriage but the lies he told were deliberate. Communication and promise to change only goes so far actions speak louder.
I hope you find your answer and he lives up to what you want but he did as the other poster said show you who he is.
