Anxiety from past issues with close family members (Dad/sister)

Dad's Double Standards part 3:

Now until   April of 2020 -i never had Taco Bell's food before.  I was going to be across the street for it for blood work,  and after that Dad (who had driven me to the blood work place) and I had decided that after the blood work's done, that I could get Taco Bell for lunch.   We had to wait in the car for a little bit  because we're supper early to order (Taco Bell wasn't open yet, not even the drive-thru).    

Well anyway since Dad didn't think I had other plans for what I was going to order ,  he tried to tell me to order the "Value Box"- which comes with a burrito, a taco, and a chalupa, along with 1 side of fries and 1 20oz soft drink.     He thought "I could share it with him" or something like that -I was aware of it, and I know it was "too much" for one person.  It could feed 3 people.   And Also Dad's not big on getting fast-food meals unless it's getting Little Caesar's Pizza.   That night i had difficultly in trying to explain about the Value box to my parents.  The following day when Mom was up here (because back then, there was drying racks behind where I'm sitting on my computer) hanging up clothes,  I showed her the Value box on Taco Bell's menu on the website and Mom agreed with me it would be better for me to order 1 taco, burrito, with fries  and a drink, because the Value Box could feed 3 people, or have 1 lunch and 2 suppers out of. 

And over a year later in 2021  Dad got grumpy that whenever I went to a restaurant that wasn't Canadian-Greek, or (now non-existent Sir Lankan) restaurant ,or a sub sandwich shop,  that I was ordering 2 burgers and saving one to eat for another day.  

August-October 2022 - A bunch of **** problems with Dad cooking.

Background:

In August of 2022 my sister had an accident with a horse she was riding. So from August, until October (with one week off when Mom and I were doing a Behind the Scenes Tour of a fictional TV detective)  that Mom was going in almost every day to see my sister in the hospital, and later in the rehab center  and it meant that except for Fridays,  I was stuck with Dad food,  and I already hated Dad food at that time because of 1)the "lunch cycles" from 2013-2020,  and 2)also the suppers he would make during 2014-2020 (as posted in earlier stories).   Oh and mom wasn't getting home until about 10pm at night.  

At this time due to normal version of (medication 1) being out we had to get permission for another version so I could only take that one at 5pm. Instead of taking it at like 9pm like I did my normal version of the medication (which i now take at almost 4pm except Thursdays when I take it at 1pm)

One last background thing-in 2012 -I finally learned to swim in our then-pool.  We had to replace it due to a tree falling on it in 2016/2017.  But I been swimming in the pool for years now when it's opened, and since last year I think, I try to do 100 laps or more (its above-ground round pool) depending on how warm the pool temp is.   Oh and also we're taking care of the 2 out of 3 of my sister's dogs at this time. 

Into stories:

Now turning this time Dad on four out of the five nights he cooked.. he would start making the supper WAAY too early.  Like he would start making potato salad at 3::45pm in the afternoon and he would make way too much of it that he would insist on it being on the table EVERY SINGLE NIGHT-but I didn't want it to be on the table on my night to cook.   And if its not gone by Friday (even if he only made it on Wed) he thinks its a "Week old". 

Once I forgot what the time was but it was before 4:45  might have been 4:20 and Dad told me to "take my time in the pool"   but I couldn't really enjoy my time in the pool unlike if Mom was cooking because on the day he told  me to "take my time" in the pool,  that he had the dinning room lights on at 6:15pm and I hadn't even been in the pool for an entire hour then!. 

And when I told Mom about Dad's "making supper crazy early"  and when the parents discussed it- he made up lies about me again saying stuff like I got into the pool before 5pm and was in the "pool for an hour and a half" 

Oh and on the same day as the burgers he got mad at me for "holding up" supper by cutting up some carrot for myself because I got sick of having cuke, cuke, cuke,  for supper. along with whatever the *** we're having.    And it was cuke with oil, and sometimes tomatoes with oil   didn't I say Dad loves a little food with his oil?  

Sept 2022 Dad's misunderstanding

Mom for some reason got buns for my sister when she was in rehab and then my sister didn't want it.  This happened on Wednesday and Mom asked me that night "if I would mind using the stale buns" for the next night's supper (Dad and I were having burgers)  either a) Mom didn't tell Dad about the buns on the stove or b)Mom DID tell Dad but he didn't pay attention.    Whatever the case was,  that Dad ended up going to a grocery store  on the Thursday and buying "Fresh" buns.    And when I tried to point out to my Dad about the stale buns he was like "I'm not the cook tonight so its none of my business."  - and I had two choices:  fresh buns burgers or make my own *** supper. 

Sept 2022

On a night that I was suppose to cook..  Dad and I not only had an argument about *** potato salad which I didn't want anywhere on the table.  I wanted it on Mars or even Saturn even.     But Dad totally wrecked supper by when I'm was going out into the pool by cutting the tiny bell  peppers  for supper.   When I had specifucally said that I ONLY needed the green-onion and the leftover hot dogs to be cut up.   But nope he tried to "help" but ruins the peppers because he did it behind my back.

When I asked why he cut up the bell peppers he claimed "I had a fit about it"     How is mentioning that "the bell peppers look tiny"  "making a fit" about it?

October 2022

Background my Mom got sick in October a week after Canadian Thanksgiving.  ON this particular day i had gotten Harvey's food. My Mom had made supper the night before and we had "real" cut up veggies (cuke, carrot, and celery).   So the next night when my Mom got sick,  I was DREADING having one more night of cuke and maybe 1/2 of a tomato with olive oil.   The only guarantee way I could make a salad, was if I made my own supper.  Mom tried to make me be Dad's assistant but I didn't want his food at all and he probably didn't want the salad, and I didn't want to have leftovers to eat the next day.  And also Dad was a bit *** off because I had "gotten fast food" for lunch because if I hadn't he could have gone to get some fast-food instead for supper.

Outside of making my own supper in order to have a salad/with supper either 1)Mom had to tell Dad to let me make a salad for supper or 2)I make the entire meal myself  but when I don't even know from one week to the next what I'm going to make for Friday's supper -how am i suppose to do it other days?    Oh and also I had tried in early August to make a meal plan list  like Mom's but  I only did I think 2 things on it (wraps, and something else) and then I got sick. 

 October 2022 Not understanding how to make a *** Turkey sandwich.

Now We needed to try to use up the turkey meat which was old now.  So we decided to make turkey sandwiches.  I had very specific instructions from Mom on how to make the Turkey sandwich.    Something like this:  Step 1: put the bread into the oven for 3 mins   Step 2: put the turkey in microwave  Step 3 -put the turkey on the bread slices back in the oven,  Step 4 put gravy on the bread slices and also put the sandwiches together now and add more gravy on top of the sandwiches.

And right off the bat, we (Dad and I) started having problems when  I started the timer  and it started counting down like it's suppose to do.  And Dad saw it and basically claimed "I had set it wrong"  by saying "I didn't have it at 3 mins" so he last 1 second by just re-doing what I just did,  and had it start at 3!  And I was literally like "THAT'S HOW IT WORKS!"

And when we're waiting for the bread to toast, I constantly was telling or asking (I can't remember which) Dad  that "shouldn't we be putting the turkey in the microwave  now?"  And Dad (who as usually, always thought he knew better) said "not now, later during the 2nd toasting of the bread"  and I know that isn't how it worked.   And I'm the one with the instructions from Mom

a few mins later we were having an argument of something else- was it stirring the gravy? And Mom got sick of listening to us arguing and came stomping out into the kitchen and was VERY *** off to find that the turkey hadn't been in the microwave yet,  and she decided to make Dad and my Turkey sandwiches herself to which Dad said to Mom: "You're as Crazy as she is!" 

Sept 2023: Dad wrecking my cuke

Background:

In the spring through summer my family has a garden in our backyard. My only problem with the garden is the cucumber  we plant is English cucumber which means when it's ready to be eaten it has to be peeled when we need to use it.   And also with any cucumber we use,  that we only need it to be "spilt in half" the length wise(?)  if  someone was making a salad.    Otherwise, its fine being left "whole".     Now despite my sister being back at her place for almost a year,  that whenever Mom was visiting my sister to basically be her laundress because she brings the clothes home to wash, and then repeats the cycle -we decided having a free-for-all suppers on that night- because otherwise, I'm eating REALLY early like 4:30pm or 5pm since Dad wants to go and wait for her about 5:45pm

Now one day on a free-for-all day,  and Mom was visiting my sister.  I told Dad after I got out of the pool-I would need help with peeling my cuke.   Dad goes overboard with "helping" and not only peels my cuke, but also cut its it half-lenght wise down the centre and I had really wanted it in slices, for that night.   And when I complained about he wrecked my cuke he was very nasty and said something like " Because You always needs help with EVERYTHING" 

 if I needed help with everything I would be in a wheelchair and not be able to do anything for myself  and I can wash myself so that's something including my own *** hair.. 

Sept 2023: Dad wrecking supper plans

And the following week on my night to cook- I had no plans for either cut-up veggies, OR a salad because we had the corn.   And when I had been trying to find Parmesan cheese in the basement fridge the previous day,  I saw corn was still in the fridge downstairs and Dad had it for lunch the previous day.    So I just assumed it was still good.   So I was working on the meat and I told Dad he could start working on the corn and Dad told me the corn was "bad" so I had to stop working with the meat in order to cut up some veggies   And I kind of blew up at Dad about it "IF the corn was so bad, why didn't he remove it from the basement fridge?":

Sept 2023 -Dad thinks I have pot of water on "Too high"

Background:

Now free-for-all suppers were happening twice a week now once when Mom was visiting my sister but also on Thursdays because Mom went to Chanel Choir practice and she didn't get home until after 9pm And also Dad wanted to take me to a shooting range.   And also I'm still learning to tell when a pot full of water+ veggies is boiling vs when the pot's empty of everything but water.   Oh and I had instructions from Mom as well on how to make Ramyeon 

Story:

Now one Thursday, earlier in the day,  Dad and  I decided to go to shooting range the following day.    I was making Ramyeon for supper and I asked Dad to keep an eye on the pot of water when I went to the bathroom and when I got back into the kitchen he said "You have it on too high"  and "I needed it on a lower setting"  but unless I wanted to wait the ENTIRE NIGHT TO HAVE SUPPER- I needed to have the water boiling and it needed to be at max.   He then started an argument claiming I was the only who started it and he tried to I don't know what to call it, but he said "if I didn't behave-we can forget about going to the shooting range"  but it's Dad who can't behave , not me.   And due to my difficultly in seeing if the water's boiling in a pot full of water + veggies-I had him check on the pot for me,  and he had the nerve to touch the stove dial and try to dial it down.  

The next time I was going to be using a pot for a free-for-all-supper, Mom had a conversation with him-I didn't hear all of it,  but one part of what Mom said is "that she  has so little control over her own life"  So basically telling Dad off for "messing" with the dials when I was trying to make supper

I think this will be my last story for tonight since I have other things I want to get done tonight

Nov 2023-Dad wrecked my Mac and cheese

I was making mac and cheese for my supper and before I add the shredded cheese I had grated myself.  After dumping the macaroni out -I first put the cheese sauce I had made into the pot and I'm have to wait until its melted a bit before I can add the shredded cheese,  the veggies, and  the Mac back into the pot.   You aren't suppose to put the pot back on the warm burner to warm up the cheese sauce.  But because Dad didn't want to listen   So he basically destroyed the cheese sauce by keeping putting it in the back burner.  So I had to get out the Queso again and Dad was like "Its look cheesy enough to me (him) "  but I was something like "I wanted it to be orange"  I actually meant yellow, so it looked more like Kraft dinner but home-made Kraft dinner  

And then he stormed off in a huff because he didn't want to listen so only the bottom of the Mac and cheese got to have the good stuff of my cheese sauce 

Fall 2009 or winter 2010 (?) Dad and Luna made me go out sick to deliver catalogues 

Background:

From 2002 to 2010 (I can't remember the exact end year when I got "laid off" but I'm pretty sure that 2010 was the correct year because I was in my first year of bowling).   I used to deliver Sears Catalogues in 2 different neighborhoods in my town.   Also I had gotten my own very first PC (aka I didn't have to share the family PC anymore with either my sister when she was at home OR my parents when they needed to use the family PC.

Story:

I was sick this one day and I still had catalogues to deliver.   But my Dad and my sister made me go out and deliver the catalogues because to them because I was playing video games on my PC that "if I was well enough to play video games I was well enough to delivery catalogues"   but by the time I got back to the street that lead to our street I felt like throwing up because I really wasn't feeling well