Being awkward in relationship/talking stages
Hello. I need a little help. It's kinda embarrassing to admit it actually but luckily it's anonym here haha. So i was observing that I'm kinda awkward in my past relationships and now In my talking stage. I stress unnecessarily about abt random things. Those are my thoughts : today I stressed really extremely about the way how i text. "Do i trexted now to dry???", "Did I texted too often??" , "Should I tell her that or tell her tomorrow when I'm less awkward??" , "Did I texted too often/ too dry so she's loosing interest or sth" , "actually I've no energy to text normal now" , "will I mess up when I text her now" , "should I just go sleep or can I make this all better later when we text tonight again?" . I don't know why I was thinking "or can I make this all better" because what do I mean ???? There's nothing I messed up right ? But i feel like I'll mess up with every message and with every texting behavior I have. I keep it all to myself because that poor girl would be confused.
I'm wondering what that is and where it comes from and how I can fix it. I wish i could just text normally without overthinking every single letter. Thank you sm for reading I appreciate every answer: )
I also made bad experience with that topic in my last relationship.
I definitely like to text rather than talk in real life cause I find myself being able to think more clear when I text rather than speaking out loud, but I think a lot of people are the exact opposite of me when it comes to that so maybe in your case, you should maybe talk on the phone it might sound scary. Maybe if that’s not what your thing is then I wouldn’t recommend it but texting you. I know I like hearing the other person’s voice. I know I like to hear the other person voices
sometimes even just talking on the phone texting or hearing a voice you can get things misunderstood, of course if you can’t talk in real life, and if you have to talk on the phone. I say the worst thing you can do is to worry about your conversation at all just relax and be yourself and try not to worry about what you’re talking about you never know the other person is probably just stressed out as you are and feeling just as awkward as you are , I know I always worry about what I’m talking about overthink especially if I really really like that person. I have really long drawn out pauses someone I’m talking to that. I like it will get easier once she gets to know that person but I think you should try to ask if , they would like to talk on the phone with you.
@communicativeApple9560
Text is fast and convenient but with no tone or context ...many a person has misread what we meant to say... it has happened to all of us.... something we think is funny ..they might not read that way.... IMO this leads to many many of us to overthink about it.... i dislike text anymore because of that.
example have you ever been caught in the Loop.... i answer a text... they send another ....i answer back so it is a game of who will quit first.
Or people who are all worked up that i texted during work or school hours ... i knew they were busy but they can answer when they have time ....not at that minute but i have ****heads that instead want to lecture about when it is "ok" for me to text so problem solved..... i quit texting them.
we all question what we wrote or how many times etc.... in a relationship you can have a talk about expectations for text or communications to ease your overthinking.