Incapable of Friendship/Relationships

To be honest, I'm not sure if I'm capable of any type of relationship or friendship at all these days...

I think it is due to past bad experiences and just self-sabotaging... Can anyone else relate?

Just to give background, I got out of a domestic violence relationship of 3+ years, and have been separated for a year... I dated in-between and ended up in toxic relationships and friendships.

I go to a domestic violence support group now though to help discorver red flags, but it is no longer a safe haven for me anymore...

I am just feeling drained...

My friends have not been valuing my time.

I recently go tricked into going somewhere triggering for hours, when said friend promised we would go hangout at the restaurant she originally mentioned.

I was supposed to hangout with her yesterday for a special event, but didn't feel like talking to her after the last stunt... then she followed me to my domestic violence group to see if I was there and I felt uneased... she never goes on the same time/day as me, she goes on a different day and hardly ever goes at all.

It felt like she was stalking me. She has said before she used to track her (abusive) ex GF via BT earbuds that have a tracker, and it creeps me out.

It's just everytime I hangout with **Micki or her friend ***Jessica, I feel exhausted.

Micki is always in toxic relationships with women, but also treats them badly by calling them "placeholders" and she likes the attention. Then Jessica complains to me about Micki being with toxic women and wants me to do something about it and I just gave up. It's annoying.

I think Micki and I trauma-bonded, so we got close, but now I'm enervated and worned out.

Just feel like I'm always doing stuff to help her, and I'm a single parent who doesn't have time... I had skipped work, called cops on her abusive ex, and tried guiding on a good path, but it's tiring... always compromising my time and health...

She says she's grateful and wants to help but I just want to be left alone since this happens too much. I'm triggered hearing about the toxic relationships each time and her ending back up in a bad situation...

I guess on a more positive note, I've been dating someone who has been pretty great, but I feel weird about him dropping too much money on me. It makes me feel...inadequate... I used to be everyone's rock and provider and now I feel useless. I asked him what I can do to make it up to him, and he said nothing but spend time with him....its weird that I feel I can't do much...I feel useless... I want to do something nice, but he has a lot of money and can get whatever he wants... idk... right now, I've promised to be his tour guide in my current city and show him around, which he agreed, but I don't know... I feel like it's not much.. he drives 2 hours down here to come see me and I feel like ***... what's wrong with me?