Is this just how men are?
I have been living with this man for two years. When things started he seemed amazing, but now we fight more than talk. I begged to have emotional support up to the point that I said I don't think I can keep doing this relationship without it. Once I said it may be over he completely changed, he started doing everything I asked, helping with the kids, checking on me when I cried, along how I'm doing. But he also says he is only doing it because he had given up on me understand rationalization of situations so he would rather be miserable than fight over it. I think that hurts more than always feeling alone. IDK what to do anymore
@Natasha6135
Yes this is a curious and possibly dubious situation your in..
It hurt you to hear what he decided to do and his reasoning..
I hope in time you will know how to deal with this or not..
You can chat with some listeners if you need more guidance..
Thank you for sharing.. 🌲
Put your self and your children first! He may not appreciate what you have at the moment or maybe he is going through his own mental and emotional dealings and either doesn’t know how or doesn’t care to be there for you the way you need. Either way focus on you and maybe you should leave for a while and if you really want the both of you to work tell him exactly what you want including space, don’t let anyone be selfish with your feelings and theirs
I have been, one of the two children in our home is mine. I learned from my marriage with my sons dad to make sure I put him first. When I did that, that was when he started doing everything I asked. He is going through a lot but what hot me was him trek long me what I wanted was dumb and made no sense he just did it not to fight.
That’s horrible, I know the feeling unfortunately as my wife did the same, no accountability only flip what’s bothering me to point out my past or that we both are responsible, pillowing talking with other men about my shortcomings meanwhile leave out all I’ve provided and what hurts the most is she was doing this at my lowest. So I get it
Put your self and your children first! He may not appreciate what you have at the moment or maybe he is going through his own mental and emotional dealings and either doesn’t know how or doesn’t care to be there for you the way you need. Either way focus on you and maybe you should leave for a while and if you really want the both of you to work tell him exactly what you want including space, don’t let anyone be selfish with your feelings and theirs
@Natasha6135
In almost all relationships couples seem to meet the others needs and wants ... Those who claim they do not like to talk are chatty etc. We look past flaws or small things and keep telling ourselves they will change in time etc.
We can ONLY change ourselves and how we react to others. Any real change in him must be from him. people try to change when others say they are leaving or it is over etc. In the end they hate doing whatever is asked for them it is a chore instead of free will in wanting to help or change and IMO makes real change less likely.
Maybe he said that mean thing in hopes you will let him out of helping etc. this is a good example of a third party like a counselor help you both communicate better. instead of threats to leave and saying things they know will upset their partner.