Long term relationship stress
I guess I just need a place to vent. I've been feeling really stressed and depressed as I started an internship this summer. It's led to me being a bit depressed because, even though I like the place I'm working at, I realized that even with the really great pay I'm getting, I still won't be able to afford to move out when I graduate college and start a full time job at the end of this year. I guess me worrying about this and complaining a lot has worn on my boyfriend. Last night he told me how I need to stop complaining so much and appreciate what I have, this is a conversation we've had before. It's just so hard when I've been working so hard to better my life and I'm not seeing any better results. But it hurts hearing him telling me how stressful I am when I've been working so hard, I feel like everything I'm doing is pointless. I just feel so depressed and defeated right now. Like there's things about him that stress me out or annoy me but I just didn't feel like it was my place to say such things, I mean we've been in a relationship for over 7 years now I figured we'd be more accepting of each other's flaws by now.
@KaleighSkys
There are times in life when we do feel we are putting in so much effort but not getting the results we want or expected .... seems perfectly fine for you to be able to share that with BF ......but he sounds frustrated by this. Have you brainstormed with him on small things to improve your outlook.
Some people IMO are just more naturally able to see positive in items and if he is like that perhaps think of something you can see positive in your accomplishment of all the hard work.
If there are things even small things and you do not speak up because as you say " accept the others flaws " i did that and sooner or later it boils over and i was i had spoken up years ago. Good communication both listening to good and bad things is key.
I do struggle with seeing the positive since it's really hard for me to celebrate any little accomplishment or progress. I've recognized at least through therapy over the years that it's due to my not so great childhood experiences. I guess we do need more communication because he's just telling me things I already know which just makes me put myself down more. As for any problems I have with him, they're not necessarily his fault or things he can change right now. It's does make me frustrated and annoyed at times but there isn't much that can be done.
@KaleighSkys
Hey, take a moment to breathe.
i also have relationship stress, and im still struggling to get rid of it, so maybe in understand partly of what you feel. I am not in your shoes, so i can't make any suggestions for better changes, but i just want to leave you an encouragement. Remember that you're strong and capable of overcoming these challenges. Take things one step at a time and have faith in your ability to find a resolution.