Married and alone at the same time
I am so scared my marriage is going to end in divorce! I've been married for going on 5 years. My husband refuses to talk about anything going wrong in our marriage. He'd rather just ignore it and get all "lovey" like I didn't just tell him what is bothering me or what I need from him. I can't have a conversation with him because he says "he doesn't want to fight". Honestly, it turns into a fight because he just refuses to do anything to help the situation or, more often than not, makes promises that never happen. I feel like I'm just here to take care of the kids and do the things he doesn't want to do at home. I never get a break and close to no help from him with the kids. I don't want a divorce, I want to fix things! He says he doesn't want a divorce, but refuses to do anything to help fix things! I have been in a few bad relationships. One abusive and one very manipulative. He isn't abusive or manipulative, but this feels just as bad. I feel like I'm not being heard and I'm not being respected! I feel like he doesn't care about how I feel at all! I am so depressed and anxious all the time. Even my medicine for those things seem not to be helping so much. I feel like I'm drowning and nobody will throw me a life vest!
@tiredmommy91
Oh goodness me, you seem to be saying he's neglecting you by not dealing with issues in the relationship.
Thank you for sharing this with us..
No, you are right, unresolved issues need to be addressed because it makes you feel unheard and not validated and valued.
I hope you can keep coming here and venting and hopefully working through this with listeners on this website.
Good luck 🌲
That sounds like my relationship. We are both getting separate therapy. He has characteristics of dismissive avoidant due to trauma. It’s important to understand why it’s triggering you and the part you play.
That sounds like my relationship. We are both getting separate therapy. He has characteristics of dismissive avoidant due to trauma. It’s important to understand why it’s triggering you and the part you play.
@tiredmommy91
A very painful thing I had to learn was that I can't change other people. Your husband is telling you who he is. He can't hear you and he can't give you what you want.
This is very frustrating. And leaves a very difficult choice. Can you accept him as he is or not?