relationship stress how can i improve myself
i’m so lost on how to build back his trust for me and how to improve so i can be a better partner someone he deserves but i don’t know where to start or what to do
@intelligentPal2479 it’s so nice that you want to hold yourself accountable and work on improving yourself in order to improve your relationship too
you mentioned building back trust for your partner.. did something happen that may have lead them to lose trust on you?
you seem quite genuine and apologetic regarding whatever happened here and I think it’s a great first step to acknowledge need for improvement even if you don’t know how to at the moment 💕 I’m so proud of uu
could you maybe ask your partner about it? what would it take from you for him to build on more trust? that can be a start I guess…
for self improvement… you can also try talking to a trusted friend or even cups listeners if you prefer anonymity … sharing what happened, what lead to it, the struggles in your relationship, why is there a need for trust building, what may have broken it, your feelings and thoughts… what’s going on in your mind, if there’s any suppressed emotions or thoughts that need to be addressed etc … talking or sharing can sometimes help us to get more clarity .. if your into self-help you can also try out journaling … to see what thoughts come up and answer to yourself on what you really need to work upon 🤗
be proud of yourself for trying friend 💕💕
thank u so much for advice i was wondering do u have any tips on how i can make him feel respected again and show that i care and genuinely love him through my actions not just words
@intelligentPal2479 aw me is so happy to know that 🥹 happy to be of some help 💕💕
tips mhm 😮
people have different love languages .. do you know what are your partners’? like what makes him feel most cared for and luvvedd? some people like word of affirmations, some like spending quality time with their partner.. gifts etc or doing something for your partner to ease their life .. could be anything small from organising their desk for them to taking them on a date to their fave place or cooking them their fave food or maybe watching their fave movie or show with them, writing letter to them or making a video collage for them with your and their pictures etc…
for me luv is in the smallest actions but people are different so I guess you’d know better what your partner would like more hehe🤗
you can also try to go back in time a lil and remember what made you both feel luvved by each other when you first started dating? as time goes by we lose out on the happy things and small things that brought us closer somehow life happens but maybe going back to that could help rekindle some more romance and care for you both? what were things you both enjoyed before? what made it feel like you both luv each other before? what helped you both trust each other before? etc going back to those things… trying them again… this time with the intention to make it even more stronger for both .. I hope it works out for both of you 💕💕💕💕💕
the thing is we’re long distance so it’s just even harder for me obviously i’m going still try my best because id rather try a million times with him than with someone else for him i think it’s through actions but it’s just a bit hard for me to do that when we’re long distance and he’s got other love languages too but i think he mainly wants me to put in more effort through actions not just words and communicate a lot. but the thing is with me it’s hard for me to figure out my own feelings and i think that affected us a lot. as well as me sometimes not choosing the right words or phrases to say. but it’s okay i want to make this work. i don’t want him to leave.
he says he misses the old us and i do too. but he’s obviously still confused and doesn’t know if he wants to stay so he’s not the same and im not expecting him to be either. but then that just makes me walk on eggshells so i pretty stay quiet and dont say much which i think is kinda affecting but im just scared what if i say one thing wrong and that makes him make up his mind and leave.
Your message is very clear, and you put it down very well. Thank you for that because it applies to my situation personally as well!
u really touched my heart💕💕
Im in a similar but kinda oposite kinda the same situation if that makes sense. Ill explain, im not going to go into as much detail about my situation as i did on another post i did last night when i was at an apex of my own personal crisis. So as i was saying, i have been married for 10 years to my wife. Everything was great for the first two years of our relationship but through bad choices, negligence and my own ability (or lack thereof) to recognize needs and wants my wife was actively expressing throughout the length of our marriage. I unconciously unintentionally caused her great harm and pain to her mind and soul. Now, with that being said fast forwarding to the present, she has currently found a man online 7000 miles away that has somehow effortlessly cured all her ailments and this interaction has turned into a full blown online emotional love affair leaving me sitting here watching it all take place right in front of my eyes. Now that my background story is on the table id like to touch on yours. We are essentially facing the same issues and what i personally am slowly coming to realize is that helping my wife/partner grow is what i was missing the whole time. Positive affirmations only go so far, the real secret atleast with my wife is the ability to actually listen to her, relate with her, and promot her growth in doing so. In order for you to be a better partner for him and someone he deserves you must first figure out exactly what kind of partner he himself thinks he deserves through strong, open, and honest communication, but also be honest to him about your honest wants, needs, desires, and goals. You are on the right path wondering what you can do and figuring out where to start...that is honestly the advice i can offer. The only other things i can think of is forgivness to yourself for any shortcomings you may have had and the sam forgivness for him as well. This will ensure growth for both of you emotionally, spiritually, and mentally as well. Burdening yourself with negative thoughts can really hold you back from your full potential.
the thing is we still love each other very much but there’s just things that are coming in between us. we’re taking a week break now hopefully he decides to stay.