Friend issues
I’m just a kid, how old? Young enough that I shouldn’t have to deal with this.. at least I think so 🤷🏻♀️
I’ve been friends with this girl I’ve known for a few years, and she was a good friend, but I believe she’s becoming bad influence on me..
I’m not a bad kid, i follow the rules, i don’t do drugs, i don’t date behind my parents back, and I never really did anything too bad. But when I met her I started doing more things I shouldn’t. Not too bad of things, i know where to draw the line. Still things I shouldnt do.
My friend showed me Omegle one day, and If you know, you know. I saw things that made me uncomfortable, I told her and she said that we wouldn’t go on video, that was still uncomfortable for me but I didn’t do anything. Then she just wanted to ‘see’ the video part of Omegle again.. I felt to awkward to say that I didn’t want to see it again.
Then recently, my friend found a drug dealer, okay whatever live your life, but then she’s wanting me to witness her get high?? I said no and she responded ‘I might hallucinate, so I have to have someone sober’ I said no again, I probably made her uncomfortable, but she should know better than to have someone a lot younger than her watch her get high..
Shes still a minor, but she’s almost an adult.
i use to help her with problems as well, I was the therapist of the group after all, but whenever I was a little distraught or something the only response I would get is ‘oof’ or ‘I’m sorry dang’ and then she’s move on. I don’t have anxiety or depression like she says she has, but I still think my feelings should be valid enough to get some concernent..
she says she has trouble helping people because she doesn’t know what to say, but it would still be nice for her to just be there for me.
I don’t know what to do. Am I a bad friend for thinking like this of her? Am I being dramatic, should I still be friends?
I’ve been thinking that I shouldn’t be friends for a while, but the thing is; we have the same friend group, if I stop being friends with her, I’ll lose all my other friends.. and everyone I know kind of ignore me..
advice anyone??
Thank you therapy family <3
I'd hate to say this but sounds like a toxic friendship. And I'm sorry your going through what you are. But I would maybe relook at the friendship and ask yourself if that's what you really what in your life. I do have people in my life that I call friends and they have done some "illigal" things and used substances even when I hung out with them and I've never touched the stuff. But as long as you know your line and don't bend on your core beliefs and they respect and understand your standing on things then maybe continue the friendship. But if she keeps pushing you knowing where you stand then it may be best to just say goodbye. It's about your mental health and weather they are respectful enough to still be called a friend.
@sinweina
Thank you, I needed that <3
I know she doesn’t mean to push me into these things, but she tends to either way. I’ve thought about talking about it with her, but I get too anxious. I believe that i should leave the friendship, but I’m not sure how.. all my friends are friends with her too, along with that, if I tell my mom anything, then (even though she’s doing things she shouldn’t) i could ruin her life by getting her mom informed on this- which I don’t want. She does trust me with that information and i don’t think it’s my place to rat her out on that.
I know I should speak to her 1v1 but I’m not sure how.
thanks anyway :)
@sinweina Agreed, a person who pushes you is not a real friend because they don't respect your boundaries.
Well look at it this way. You don't need to say anything to anyone else. Just sit down and explain your boundaries. If she is a true friend she would respect it. If she keeps pushing its your moral compass and you core beliefs that should tell you exactly what you need to know. You shouldn't bend them to fit it any group. I always have a rule of thumb with everyone if you want to talk to me and unless stated otherwise it stays between us. And there are times when some of the people I hung out with due to being acquaintance of another friend tried pushing something onto me and I say no. If they persists I just walk away. I don't say anything. And sometimes that's just what you need to do.
