I need to
Hi all,
I'm new here. I've been with my lover for four years. I can't believe how hooked I am. I feel more like an addict to his approval and care than anything else... right now he's in a silent mode. Punishing me because I put some limits. I need to get out. Right now he's on holidays with his family, but I fear if I see him, I'll get hooked again. He manipulates me so well. Any tips as to how to start? Can't block him, because we work together. � And I also fear the discredit part of the cycle. � I've seen him doing it, and he's vicious.
Thanks to you all.
[Edited by @QuietMagic 11/20/21 to remove stigmatizing content]
@slumberland75
the words "addicted to his approval" really resonated with me. I'm going through a similar situation. I dont have any advice for you, but I want you to know your not alone <3
you are not alone. I just ended my relationship of two years.
[Edited by @QuietMagic 11/20/21 to remove stigmatizing content]
He has trained you well. I spent 15 years with one and know exactly what you feel. But it's not real, your relationship is based on lies and his rules, there is no genuine love from him just control over you. Sadly, they are incapable of real love, their egos are so fragile that they get their emotional fix from being emotional vampires. This results in you losing 'yourself' and this is what they want so that you never leave them. Your confidence, your self worth and your life is not yours anymore, his puppet on a string. He has reduced you to not thinking or respecting yourself and has stripped you of your own vision of self worth. You dont need him for approval, he should value you for the wonderful person you are. Move on before you fade away, there are lots of lovely people out there who will let you shine for being you, and not just to make them feel better. We are not to be trained as emotional crutches for weak egos. Happy to chat anytime.
[Edited by @QuietMagic 11/20/21 to remove stigmatizing content]
@slumberland75 thank you for sharing your struggle with us here. Ending toxic relationships is so difficult. You are not alone in your struggle. Some people are really good manipulators, and it is difficult to end the relationship because of that. However, I believe you are strong, and you are capable to take the steps necessary to prioritize your own well-being over this relationship.