Married to a SERIOUS gamer :(
So, my husband and I have been married for 1 year. I knew he was a gamer before we married, but I didn't know that it would make me feel so lonely. He has his friends that he talks to when he is gaming and I am sitting there watching Netflix or doing something just to pass the time by myself. I get super lonely and sometimes it really depresses me! I don't live in the state where I am from so I don't have a lot of friends around to go and hang out with. I've tried talking to him about it and he goes through little patches where he only plays when I am not home, or only for a few hours if he knows I am doing something. But like I said, it's patches of him being considerate about it and the times that he doesn't he will go every single night until 2 or 3am and I just fall asleep alone, and am in the room alone...
I have recently been trying to stay up later in the living room so we can go to bed together, but I always end up falling asleep on the couch and he just keeps playing and yelling into his head set. Then I wake up annoyed and go into the room STILL alone!
It's really starting to get to me and I don't know what to do. I knew what I was getting into, I just didn't know how it was going to make me feel over time.
Does anyone else have anything similar or any advice?
@lala013 It sounds incredibly lonely to be in the same home but still feel so separate from him, especially after moving away from your own support system. You’re doing so much to try to feel connected staying up later, trying to spend time together and it seems really painful when that ends with you falling asleep alone again. Anyone in your place would feel hurt and isolated. What has been the hardest part of all of this for you?
@lala013
Hey, I hear you
It sounds really tough feeling so lonely while your husband spends long hours gaming. Even though you knew he was a gamer, it’s completely understandable that the reality of feeling alone and disconnected is harder than you expected.I can see that you’ve tried communicating with him and making adjustments, like staying up to go to bed together, which shows you really care about your relationship. It’s normal to feel frustrated and sad when things don’t work out the way you hoped.You’re not alone in feeling this way — many people struggle with balancing personal hobbies and quality time with their partners. It’s okay to acknowledge your feelings and take steps to care for yourself, even while figuring out ways to connect with him.
You’re doing your best, and it’s okay to feel how you feel. I’m here to listen anytime you want to talk about it.
@lala013 I'm sorry to hear about your troubles. I think I can offer you some suggestions. If you feel unwell, please be brave enough to express your opinions. For example, you could have a good talk with your husband.
@lala013I’m really sorry you’re dealing with this—it sounds deeply lonely. Wanting to feel connected and go to bed with your partner isn’t asking for too much. You’ve tried to communicate and compromise, and your feelings here truly matter.
