Need a friend. Im a strong introvert.

Im terribly introverted and the current situation im in has me feeling vulnerable to break down. Trying to start talking to people is way out of my wheelhouse but it needs to be done because im very isolated. Its been a really tough year on my family and without going into major detail my family is all i have for a support system. My wife of 7 years recently has been going through grief, stress, and trauma in a catastrophic way. I unfortunately stayed strong so long that ive caused harm to myself emotionally. She has grown very distant over just the course of a couple of weeks and has shut me out of support and partnership. I have tried everything and it seems like im making the distance worse. Im trying to save us. We have a whole life together. Kids, house, careers,doggos and it feels like its all tumbling down. Problem is i dont have a support system as im anti social admittedly and have a hard time with social anxiety. This all happening recently has made me feel even more isolated and depressed and i dont have anyone in my corner. All ive been doing for for many years is feeling comfortable with family and never made a support system for a time like this. I feel so alone and the thought of losing my family is overwhelming. Im stuck in a situation that feels cold and malice and uncompromising. Ive never seen this side of her and i have been doing everything i can (space, calm talks, routine) but its gotten really bad because i literaly do not have a shoulder to cry or an ear to listen. I need to make conversations and friends. It doesn't even need to be all about my issues. I just need to stop feeling so alone on this planet and im reaching out for the first time in my life. My panic attacks are increasing. Im having at least 3 major attacks a day at times and no support system because all i feel now from my wife is coldness and uncaring behavior witch i never even knew she was possible of doing. I emphasize we could talk about neutral subjects. But i feel like i am breaking down and i cant possibly breakdown if i want my life to continue in any positive direction. Im trying to change myself but i emphasize im so terribly socially akward i cant even talk to people playing video games with mics. It upsets her to even mention anything and it upsets me to not and feel alone.