struggling to trust
My boyfriend cheated on me in the past and it has been effecting my life ever since. We broke up and I was happy single for some time. After months of him apologising and trying to win back my trust. We're now back together and it's going better. But he once told me the time he cheated, how he finds his female best friend perfect. Our friends also rumored that he had a big crush on her before he met me. After he broke my trust and after some fights he distanced himself from that friend and lets me read his chats, but I'm convinced that they're texting on other apps where I can't see the messages, because they get immediately deleted. I also fear that one day he'll start to feel that she should be the one. Even tho they're not close friends anymore. I'm friends with her too now, but honestly I really don't want her to be in our lives ever. All of our friends also distanced from her after she's done some toxic things.
@indigoOrange9898
I get why you're struggling to trust on him and rightfully so it does take time to build trust specially one that has been broken before
He better put in more efforts because you do not deserve to second guess all the time or feel on edge about him, you deserve someone you can trust on and feel emotionally safe in the relationship with ❤
Have you tried telling them about your concerns?
thank you, I did try and he was angry telling me that he has little to no contact with her so he doesn't understsnd my concerns. He told me that he has cared a lot about me, cried about me, and did a lot of things for me he never did for anyone else, so I shouldn't think that he likes her in the same way and even if he ever had a crush on her I was the one he cared about the most
So why did he get back with you if he thinks this friend is so great and why would he admit that to you? It sounds like he loves you but also thinks the idea of his friend is good. Maybe he’s smart enough to know ideas aren’t always what they’re cracked up to be. I would suggest trying to avoid contact or hanging out with her if you think she’s no good for the relationship.
i had a bf who had a crush on a girl but got friend zoned years back. I think he still cared for her and if it had worked out would’ve been with her. They were across the country from each other so it’s hard to say but he would talk to her for advice. I was extremely jealous because she looked nothing like me. She had a partner though and clearly wasn’t interested in him like that. If you think this girl may be try to distance yourselves from her
My fear is that one day she'll see how great he is and when me and him would fight in the future or ever split, that they'll end up being together...I think that they would suit well together and it hurts for me to think of that possibility. She once even said what kind of guys she likes and it could've been my boyfriend. lookwise and kind of character wise.
