breakup advice??
ok so am i being shitty for wanting to break up with my bf? we’ve been together for a long time and it’s actually been really great the whole time. i just feel like im in a bad place mentally and recently just my relationships in general have been kinda exhausting to maintain. i love him, he’s great it’s just i feel like he deserves better than someone who can’t keep up anymore yk?? i just feel bad for just giving up when things got hard for me bc i know that he’s also not in a good place and i can’t just leave when he’s just as bad as i am mentally yk?? bc ik how he feels and i cant do that to him,,,i just feel like it’s the right person at the wrong time :(( we’re also long distance which doesn’t help,,, as much as i love him i dont want to be wasting my time on someone so far away when i could be with someone right in front of me. it was great at the start but it’s too much for me now and i feel like it’s not working the same way it used to. he deserves someone who can be there for him the way i used to be able to, i’ve just changed personally and i feel like it’s not fair if i stay with them when im losing interest… i just don’t know how to bring it up or ease them into it since i feel like it’s all kind of sudden. idk,, sorry if this is a lil all over or doesn’t make much sense im just kinda ranting,,, but yeah
If you feel like you're tired give yourself time to rest it's not bad to ask some space to your partner specially when you're dealing with something just make them understand why you need the space and it doesn't mean that you're in a bad place he doesn't deserve you anymore, he loves you for who you are and don't ever think that you're not enough.
"Right person at the wrong time" i feel like this phrase isn't real.... In my perspective if he's the right person for you both of you will help each other go through every problem that you face, you just need to communicate. Long distance relationships are hard but they work trust me, you just need to communicate with each other and do virtual activities with each other such as painting through facetime or have a virtual date that would be fun!! There are a lot of things that you can do... I mean yes physical interaction is different but since we can't afford that yet let's stick with the things that are accessible
"It's not working the same way it used to."
Love
Isn't always there, there will be days that we will feel like we don't like our partner but that doesn't mean that we don't love them anymore yk.
I am not sure if you're familiar with the band called Ben &Ben but if you have time to check them out listen to their song "Araw - Araw" (Everyday) it's a Tagalog song but they have subtitles.....
The reason why I want you to listen to this song because there will be days that we will feel like we don't like our partner but even its like that you will still choose him you will still pick him always and forever that's why I think they chose "Araw-araw" (everyday) as a title.
https://youtu.be/XVhEm62Uqog
Idk if i made sense but i hope this helps
What you can't predict nor control is how your partner reacts. But one thing for sure is how you feel.
I suggest you have a chat with your boyfriend first and let the emotions and conversation flow from that.
If you truly treasure your boyfriend, you should allow him to share his thought after sharing your feelings instead of dropping the bomb. Only if you can't compromise and find a solution to keep the happy relationship should both parties break up. I think he deserves that if he has done nothing wrong.
Just my personal opinion :)