Feeling like I’m not a good wife anymore 😭😭😭😭
I am a believer in Christ but never been good at praying
I was texting my husband earlier and he said he has constant communication with him which made me feel inadequate to be his wife. I every now and then pray for my husband but I don’t have constant communication with him😭😭 it’s not something I’m naturally good at and I have ADHD and I get easily distracted with everything! I would be reading right now but I’m on here. I don’t know where to start with prayer I am glad he has a better relationship than me with him but I’m just feeling like I’m not the wife he needs as he needs a praying wife and I’m sadly not that kind not right off the top. I don’t know who to talk to on here about this matter I’d like someone who can help me with this to message me. A praying husband deserves a more actively praying wife but I just have alot going on personally with ADHD Autism and intellectual disability I am easily distracted and don’t know where to start as my heart desires to have a close relationship with the Lord and to pray for my habit it doesn’t come out of my mouth very often. I feel like a no good wife sure I clean cook give him his needs and attention support him and love and care about him. I just feel like putting myself in a dark place and crying and I know he tells me more of the truth than anyone else so I believe he does have a better relationship and at times I do pray and pray for him to have a better relationship with him and better communication and everything. Now I’m feeling like he’s just out of my league here he is constantly having communication with him and me not saying a prayer every day sometimes not every week other than at the table. He loves me and everything else he just deserves better than me. He deserves a praying wife that won’t beat herself down. One who will pray with him and pray for him. He doesn’t do alot of reading but he does alot of praying from what it sounds like. I just don’t understand anything in my life disabilities not being able to mother properly, drive, have a career and I just feel like a nobody. One that won’t ever be anyone worth anything. I know Gid thinks differently but I don’t feel like the things he says I am. How am I the wife he needs me to be for my husband if I don’t pray much and it’s hard for me to pray?
@Tiffany48
You are a great wife.
You give your husband love, respect and the space to express his beliefs.
You don't have to pray at the same rate.
Prayer is different to everyone person.
It's from the heart.
All you can do is be open to receiving and not pressuring yourself.
You are doing your best 💜💕
Is your relationship just solely based off of praying? Is this a deal breaker for him, am I getting this right?
I'm sorry, but as a person who's not religious, when I hear this is sounds ridiculous. I don't mean to sound rude, but I hope that you understand that if this is taking the fun out of your life and instead it's turning into agony, might as well stop making this the center of your sole existence. I'm sure God does not want you to suffer, but instead be happy and love.
Is your relationship just solely based off of praying? Is this a deal breaker for him, am I getting this right?
I'm sorry, but as a person who's not religious, when I hear this is sounds ridiculous. I don't mean to sound rude, but I hope that you understand that if this is taking the fun out of your life and instead it's turning into agony, might as well stop making this the center of your sole existence. I'm sure God does not want you to suffer, but instead be happy and love.
@Tiffany48
It sounds like you put an awful lot of pressure on yourself. What comes through strongest in what you wrote is how much love and devotion you have towards your husband. There is a lot there about how you want to be for him, and what you feel you should be doing. It was really hard to hear you say that you feel out of his league and a nobody, and my heart goes out to you. No-one should feel that they are unworthy.
Might it be possible that you are putting too much responsibility on your own shoulders? That you do not pray as much as you feel you aught to, or that you find it hard to, seems like your beliefs about what is expected of you are making you very unhappy. You even mention that you think God would think differently. So is there really any flaw in the way that you pray compared to your husband? I would imagine that your husband loves you very much, and would not want you to feel so unhappy. It is a very understandable trait to compare ourselves to others, especially those we care about or admire. But if it brings unhappiness, that doesn't benefit anyone.
@Amanda84 said it very succinctly and her words are very sage. Putting pressure on yourself is not making you happy and sounds very stressful. You sound like a very caring and thoughtful person. Perhaps there is space to show some of that care and consideration to yourself? It is not selfish to take steps to be comforted and freed from stress. After all, I imagine your loved ones want you to be happy....so by being kind to yourself you are also being kind to them.
