How to be kind to yourself

@neatCherry4859

Make friends with yourself ....

i know that sounds corny or weird but when i started to see myself through other eyes i saw i am OK just as I am ... i quit comparing myself ... i quit trying to be something i wasn't but just enjoyed me....when we compare we often imagine the other person better then they actually are as well making it an unfair comparison to begin with. 

when you are comfortable in yourself ........you are more open to new friends....... as you can related one on one without  seeming aloof when you are constantly searching for the "right" words or how to act around friends.   People can be at first uncomfortable  with a person at ease with themselves because even if we do not see it others are stressing and doing comparisons etc like we have been. 

@neatCherry4859 We are born very delicate beings. We are curious and open. You are still that precious delicate being. Our parents are responsible for us at this stage and most treat us as precious beings. As we grow into adults we take over the job of our parents in a way and become our own parents. So as your own parent treat yourself as you would your own baby. Some people think the role of a parent is to toughen their child. And many of us adopt that attitude toward our own selves. And there are no shortage of people who want to tell us we suck and are not good enough - that we should be a certain way. But a good parent isn’t going to borrow the advice of passing strangers who have no investment in our children - people who just want to feed their own ego. When you are aware of your inner thoughts and emotions in a curious loving thoughtful way you’ll learn to love yourself. You’ll see that other humans have the exact same condition - we are all just these people confronting what it means to be human. This is internal - it’s about how we process feelings - rich or poor, gifted or not. You’re on an even playing field when it comes to being human. Develop this self parent caring for yourself. And yes you’ll fall into the habit of comparing yourself to others. That’s also part of being human. BUT be aware of when your mind starts comparing yourself to others and once aware, just stop and be a loving parent to yourself. It’s about honoring your birthright of being just as deserving as any and all other human beings. Learning how to love yourself is not weakness and need not be narcissistic. 

Yes, it is hard... I try to play sports and challenge myself to see the achievements, which boost my self-esteem

@neatCherry4859 First off, I'm so sorry you feel this way, it's super hard and I'm so proud of you for making this step to ask for help! That means you care about yourself and that is a lovely feeling <3

In my self love journey, I've noticed that healing and breakthroughs come when I'm outside my comfort zone. I know that may be an uncomfortable idea, but you've got to trust me. I learned that by being open with myself, I've come to better understand my feelings and accept them for what they are. Just feelings. Not to downplay the emotions you're feeling, because those are important too, but more to recognize the negative self-talk or the feelings you feel negatively toward yourself (which are lies btw, you're amazing :) <3). Also taking steps into self care, even simple things like taking a shower or cleaning your room or giving your body food to fuel your beautiful self have helped me feel sooo much better!  I know this may seem cheesy, but it's okay to give yourself a hug too. That's a feeling i really like, when I've had a hard day to come home, eat something and give myself a hug. It really helps me to feel better, and it has amazing benefits for gaining higher self esteem, loving and trusting yourself, and even self soothing.

I hope this helps a bit, I wish you the best of luck in your journey! <3 :)