Are my expectations too high?
Setting self-expectations is beneficial in life but they need to be realistic otherwise they will leave us frustrated and might also reduce our self-esteem. We cannot completely avoid having unrealistic expectations some of the time - we are humans and humans make mistakes - but we can learn from it and not make them too high. Having unrealistic expectations on a regular basis is not healthy. They can chip away at relationships, block reaching goals, and even steer our lives in an unhealthy direction.
Participation question
Do you feel your self-expectations are set in a way that motivates you and encourages you to grow in life?
Helpful Videos
Do You Have Unrealistic Relationship Expectations?
How To Have Realistic Expectations
Transforming Unrealistic Expectations - BBCorner
Seeking Help
Mental stress can cause us not to be able to see the good things in life and lead to excessive rumination or worries which can result in serious health problems. If you have serious, long-term problems with negative thinking and feeling depressed, see your doctor or talk to a therapist if they are related to any mental challenges.
Are you looking for a therapist? 7cups has online, certified therapists with a paid option. For more information click on this link https://www.7cups.com/online-therapy/?ob=1
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I had started this post got a phone call from beloved friends who are family; they were and are well worth the time. 💜💜💜
I was a perfectionistic overachiever. No one had higher standards or was harder on me than I was on my ownself. I came to see this was destructive and that my perfectionism was choking the life out of my life.
My first attempt at correcting this was to apply myself to failing at everything. In this I also overachieved. When my life was well and thoroughly wrecked, I also realized this wasn't the answer. I wasn't free from my internal prison and now I had all the consequences from laying waste to my life as well!!
In my circumstances, I was adopted by Satanists for use in rituals. They did not love me and they did not kid themselves about that, I believe. Not truly. They held their love and approval out like a carrot and stick. Each outstanding achievement, they set the goalposts higher and moved the carrot a bit farther off.
I finally was freed when I realized the truth: they had never loved me; it was all a game to them. An unwinnable game. Knowing that NOTHING I did could ever get them to love me, and that they in fact never had loved me, I was finally able to walk away from that and choose to found my life on something else.
I was with my 2nd husband at the time this realization occurred. He then chose drugs, cheating and various types of abusing me, so in consequence of all that, I responded by choosing to leave him and not allow myself to be treated that way. He was my rock bottom.
It has been hard but uphill from there. Third last best greatly beloved husband H. we are so grateful for each other. We got it good; we know it, and we also fought for all we have.
Not one thing came easy or just got handed to us. We had to fight enemies internal and external because baddies always want to steal your blessings.
We continue the fight!!
@RogueOne1983 huggs you ❤❤ through it all you've kept a good heart, your love and kindness. And you fight so hard to keep the hero! In you shinning bright 🌞 I love you ❤❤
@Tinywhisper11 thanks so much for this encouragement love you too!!💛💙💜🦄🍪
@RogueOne1983
I'm so glad that you got out of these toxic situations and found the love of your life at the end. To get out of what you have been through takes courage and strength. I admire you! 💙
@amiablePeace77 thanks so much!! me too!!
@amiablePeace77 Do you feel your self-expectations are set in a way that motivates you and encourages you to grow in life?
I expect that my main source of happiness will be from helping other people. I also want to do self care, but self care alone does not fulfill my deepest wish to be a factor in other people'happiness. I see all the suffering in the world and it motivates to help people in ways that I am able.
@soulsings this is lovely we need more like you! 💛
@soulsings agrees with rouge we definetly need more people like you ❤❤
you are such an amazing person. Everyone who has the privilege to talk to you, can see how amazing you are ❤ I believe there are earth angels, many of them, you are definetly a earth angel ❤
@Tinywhisper11 thank you for your kind and supportive words. If there is an angel workers union, you are definitely in it. You spread kindness and compassion wherever you go.
@soulsings awww ❤❤❤ hugs you ❤
@amiablePeace77 my main expectations is kindness, and acceptance.
My higher expectations are to replace my legs with pogo sticks (bouncy springs) so I can go boinging around😁 and to replace my missing fingers with tiny little pissstols😎 I'll be the coolest person everrrr! I'm not sure if those expectations are to high, or impossible🤔🤔🤔
😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂
@RogueOne1983 😂😂😂😂😂😂😂
@Tinywhisper11
You are the coolest person and also the cutest one already! 💙
@amiablePeace77 yaaaay! Thanks ❤❤ I love you ❤
@Tinywhisper11 I just read you want to replace your missing fingers with little finger pistols, and I think this is the best idea I have heard today 😄😄😄😀😀😂
@RogueOne1983 😁😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂 I would be sooo cool
Before a few years ago when my depression set in i had no expectations. Expectations have an underlying limitation built in. I expect to be a factory forman suggests that its the best you can expect otherwise you would expect to be the CEO.
Because of this i have done whatever i wanted: Computer Programming, Draftsman, Non-profit manager, Game designer, Musician. Musician didn't work out, turns out i have no rhythm.
These days I don't have any long term plans so I have no expectation on how they will work out.
@Gettingbettertoday I think it is great you at least tried things it turned out you weren't good at.
Many are afraid to!!