Opening up?

@Ch3rry98

Breakups are often painful but realizing the relationship might have never been as you saw it makes it particularly hard. So sorry that you're going through this right now.  Know you have people here who want to support you. You can always connect to a listener for a chat and some comfort. Talking to someone can help to learn to open up step by step in a safe place. Feeling safe is very important when suffering from trauma. I hope being here on the site will help you to feel better in life and to learn to trust others again.

@Ch3rry98 Friend, I understand how you feel, I had anxiety when I was younger, my life was literally ***, but I started treatment with a psychiatrist and my life got better, wow, I'm so grateful that you're here at 7cups, a website for people who want to improve themselves and work on their mental health, that's incredible, I really hope you're happy, thank you very much for sharing a little bit of your life, thank you dear friend.

Dw dr everything is tempory in this world so dw.

@Ch3rry98 hey im a 17 yr old guy and i feel the same
in my case we've not broken up yet tho...but its pretty much the same
if theres anything ive realised...that is
its normal
its more common than we think
and one can learn to live with it

@Ch3rry98 I feel like friendship is about responsibility which can be draining at times. How about you just start with casual conversations with people .. it just takes the pressure off everyone... you don't have to invest much and you don't expect much.. and it brings some comfort into your life.. what do you think about this approach?

@Ch3rry98 I'm really sorry you're feeling this way right now. Breakups and the emotions that come with them are tough, and it can be incredibly hard when you're feeling alone and disconnected. It’s okay to be scared to open up—being vulnerable can feel like a huge risk, especially if you’ve been hurt before. But taking small steps towards trusting others and opening up when you're ready can help in the healing process. It's okay to take your time, and you don't need to rush. You are worthy of genuine connections, and I truly believe that with time, you'll find people who appreciate you for who you are. In the meantime, it’s okay to focus on your own well-being and take care of yourself. You don’t have to have it all figured out now. You’re allowed to heal at your own pace. I'm rooting for you!

I’m suffering a fresh break up and have no close friends either so I completely understand. Sending love.

@Ch3rry98

Your feelings of emptiness after a break up are normal because that person who you had is now gone.   It's ok to sit with the feelings of emptiness and sadness.    It's also ok to sit with them as long as you need to because those feelings will pass.  In the meantime, being a lone wolf is not such a bad thing.    That means that you feel confident with who you are. 

@Ch3rry98

awe, your feelings are totally valid. But I think being vulnerable and showing vulnerability / being open about your struggles encourages others to do the same thing 🫶🏼 it’s not easy, but that’s the way it works, and then you become people’s safe space and which in turn makes them comfortable enough to share things with you and also vice versa 

I definitely could use someone to talk to, and vent about some things I’m going through, so if you’re open to that, either with me or someone else, it actually makes opening up easier ♥️

@Ch3rry98 Sometimes, as hard as it may seem in your thoughts, acting on a fleeting moment of indiscretion and just giving into doing something you may rarely, if ever, have the courage to do might just be the best thing for you. 

I'm 44 in a long term relationship, which has definitely been in a difficult lul for the past 5 years, and I feel stuck in this place and this person I don't even recognize anymore. However, I'd used to be such an entirely different person than I've been living as for God knows how long. Looking back I was reckless and constantly searching out something to fill this "emptiness" that I had used to fill with drugs and bad decisions. I've been such a shell of who I had been, which to some may sound like a healthy change. I'd agree that the drugs and bad decisions weren't healthy. However, my point is that I used to be so entirely unattached to what others thought and often I think that is something I miss about life. Acting on an impulse sometimes may lead you to places you may have or may never find otherwise. 

I'm not advocating for recklessness. I'm merely saying that we often tend to be far more critical of ourselves than anyone we interact with. I think this can get us stuck in places where we're too afraid, too self-conscious, too whatever.....to just give in to something. 

If you live anywhere there's social events or just about anything fun going think to yourself all of the things that could possibly go wrong; which are near null. Get out of your own self-criticism and give into a fleeting moment and run with it. I'm telling you that the worst thing that will happen is you go out and don't meet anyone. However, if you don't try you'll assuredly never find what you're looking for. So, why not just recognize the worst case scenario is nothing but the possibilities are vast. I hope you put yourself out there and find what you're looking for.