Traumatic Experiences Community Daily Check In - Saturday October 28th 2017
Welcome to Saturday folks!
As a child I used to dread the weekend! It meant spending time at home with family members who I felt hated me. They would spend the day getting drunk, I would spend it trying not to be noticed. I never really considered how damaging this experience was, so it surprised me years later in therapy to be asked about my inner child. How was little Debs? Did she still feel scared, was she still cowering away?
Its quite a concept to get your head around, the thought that your inner child may still be cowering away inside you, holding on to fears and insecurities that are holding back your recovery as an adult. But its a concept Ive grown to accept is very relevant. As children were like little sponges. We learn so much and so quickly. It really is the period of our lives where we change and develop the most. And we trust those significant adults in our lives, parents, teachers, siblings, anyone we perceive to be ‘in charge. So if the messages were getting from them arent always helpful or true, we may grow up with these damaged or slightly wonky views. Such as our opinions dont matter, we should stay quiet and not be any trouble, we dont deserve to be treated well.
These views then harden as we grow up, and rather than question the validity of them, we shore them up with further experiences that seem to confirm their truth. And so, our insecurities, our negative self image, our guilt at being the way we are, they become a solidly held belief, one that is really hard to shift. As a listener I often hear ‘its different for me, words Ive told myself too.
‘Would you say those negative things to someone else in your position? ‘No, but its different for me.
But its not different for you! You deserve love and compassion, patience and kindness, just as much as the next person. As does your inner child. So lets all love our inner child that little bit more, starting today. You can become the parent your inner child always needed and deserved.
This is your safe space. Please feel free to drop by and say hello. Tell us how youre feeling. Dont feel you have to be alone ❤️
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I am feeling really great about getting into php and still going to reikie - so, a lot of the trauma related things I battle have calmed down a bit - yasssssss!
But, I am super stressed trying to get everything done before it starts because it, including commute to the city, is all morning, afternoon and evening.
I will literally have no time to do anything else -even things I NEED to get done ( you know, the adulting thing).
And I still want my 7 cups time, my "me" tme....
AND - my aunt told me in order to live here ( i live with her) i have to WORK too!
Um....does she expect me to work the overnight shift? And get NO sleep? Bc that is the Only shift I would be able to work with my hours.
Screw that - it is MY self care time - I just lied to ler ( lil lie) and said i am working there for a few hours a day.
Hey - what can ya do - I don't wanna be sleeping in my car.
#stresssssssssssssssssssssssssssssss
@blissedNblessed
Sounds like you need a few extra hours in your day, or maybe an extra day? It could be squeezed in between Sunday and Monday, and be called Funday. Who
@DeborahUK
* signs petition for Funday
:D
Struggling today. Doesn
@themainjane
Sorry to hear its a struggle today Jane. Please feel free to share more and let us know if we can offer comfort or support in any way.
@DeborahUK
Thanks, Deb or Deborah? I
@themainjane
I answer to both Jane :)
Never Debbie though. That brings out my inner monster!
@DeborahUK
Ok, thanks. I will remember.