Traumatic Experiences Community Daily Check-in Friday 25th August 2017
Good Morning Everyone, I'm so happy you're here. I thought today wed focus on rejection and emotional pain. Heavy subject matter. Personally I struggle with my emotional pain. When I feel the pain I'm unable to function. So What are our options?
Guy Winch, author of Emotional First Aid: Practical Strategies for Treating Failure and Rejection recently shared an interesting tip on rejection. Guy Winch says Rejection actually activates the same pathways in your brain as physical pain, which is one reason why it hurts so much. The feeling of rejection toys with your innate need to belong, and is so distressing that it interferes with your ability to think, recall memories and make decisions. The sooner you let go of painful rejections, the better off your mental health will be.
But how can we let go? Let's look into the theory of Radical Acceptance. The meaning of Radical Acceptance described by Hall, Karyn PH D. In the article Pieces of Mind. Psychology Today. Su July 8 2012. she recalls, Radical Acceptance is about accepting of life on lifes terms and not resisting what you cannot or choose not to change. Radical Acceptance is about saying yes to life, just as it is. Suffering is what you do with that pain and the interpretation you put on the pain. Suffering is optional; pain is not. Its difficult to accept what you dont want to be true. And its more difficult to not accept. Not accepting pain brings suffering.Avoidance of emotions often leads to depression and anxiety. Avoidance can also lead to destructive behaviors such as gambling, drinking too much, overspending, eating too little or too much, and overworking. These behaviors may help avoid pain in the short run but they only make the situation worse in the long run. By having Acceptance means you can turn your resistant, ruminating thoughts into accepting thoughts like, Im in this situation. I dont approve of it. I dont think its OK, but it is what it is and I cant change that it happened. Acceptance allows you to heal by sitting in the pain and resisting you for long the hurt.
Remember this is a safe place for you to share your thoughts and to seek support from each other.
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@Softwhispers
Hi..
@sensitiveShade5337 hey
@sensitiveShade5337 are you struggling with anything you'd like to talk about? I'm here to listen.
@SoftForestHSP77
I do yes..
@sensitiveShade5337 what are you struggling with? <3
@SoftForestHSP77
with many stuff..
@sensitiveShade5337 how can I help you best?
@SoftForestHSP77
you can't.. no one can
@sensitiveShade5337 would you like to pm me??
@SoftForestHSP77
i don't want to bother you
@sensitiveShade5337 oh it would be nice to talk to you :)
@Softwhispers avoiding, avoiding because its safer right now. stress at work and family. sh is th only thing allowing work to happen. sick with anxiety today but on late discharges shift. no time to be nice to me.
@inventiveOrange1 Big hugs, Orange -- I'm sorry you're stuck working late while feeling like this x
@melliotm hugs mell. Made it through 12 hour shift. Just hope i havent made any errors for patients 😕 can collapse now. My uncle also survived his op and back on icu. Hoping to visit his hosp tomorrow. How is your day going?
@inventiveOrange1 Oh I'm so glad to hear about your uncle. Apart from a series of nightmares disrupting my night and having to leave the fort this morning for a doctor's appointment, my day has been...ok. I'm tired and foggy, but trying to be compassionate and not avoid feeling the uncomfortable feels that drove some of last night's sleeplessness.
@melliotm aww nightmares suck 🙁. All the best for the docs appointment. Im beyond tired but as usual cant sleep. Least no work today. Hugs
@inventiveOrange1 One thing is if work is filling you with anxiety try like taking a mental health day every now and again abd just take a nice hot bath and just relax and take care of yourself
@inventiveOrange1 I hope things are getting better for you. Hugs
@Softwhispers
Hey. I had a hard night. I have done self-harm again last night. And I'm really not proud about it... But it's okay. Nothing goes away so easily, still have to keep working, tho I'm pretty tired right now. I got paranoid again. But I'm okay... it's raining outside, it helps to keep my mind calmer. And I know I can count on some person, now :)
@Zombii sorry to hear you had such a rough night but just remember a relapse shows that your on the road to recovery
@Softwhispers
Right <3 I try to keep that in mind :)
@Zombii a tip for when you feel you want to relapse do anything else even make up work if you have none it's what I do :)
@Softwhispers
That's a good tip, thank you <3
@Zombii I'm glad that I could give a useful tip
@Zombii I'm glade you can see that self arming is not safe. But you recognize this and realize that with time you can take baby steps to get better. Nothing just happens overnight. :) Changing takes time. <3 You can do it!!!
@SoftForestHSP77
Aww thanks <3
@Softwhispers
I thought this post was for yesterday. I found myself in post... I overehelmed myself sometimes and worry to much..
@conscientiousPineapple1782 Nope this post was for today. :)
@conscientiousPineapple1782 I'm sorry your overwhelmed. Whats making you feel like this?
@SoftForestHSP77
Idk bcs didn't acept complitly what happened... Althought lately feel better seams. At night feel anxious.
@conscientiousPineapple1782 How do you cope with your anxiousness? What works best for you?
@SoftForestHSP77
Not best soluction sometimes alcohol a bit.
Weel mostly at night feel anxious.. Try to relax and some metods...
@conscientiousPineapple1782 we definitely all have ways we cope that aren't as helpful. It can feel like the alcohol helps in the moment. But it masks over the problem which only will have to be solved at some point. What are some positive ways you could distract yourself from these anxious feelings?
@SoftForestHSP77
Teeling myself I am safe even if don't feel that way like. Trying to calm myself. Talk about what bothers me. Going to bed earlier and try not to overthink.
@conscientiousPineapple1782 You have a bunch of great ways to help yourself cope. Maybe make a list of them on your phone and when your struggling take a look at them. List as many ways as you can. At times certain coping strategies help more then others. So be prepared with as many as you can think of!
I met a new guy, and I really like him. I'm just afraid I'll say the wrong thing, and he'll run away. I guess the newness of a relationship can traumatic and full of anxiety. I'm trying to be excited, but I'm so worried.
@Rebekahwriter13
That sounds so nice for you! Its pretty normal to feel excited but also a little worried. Just try to take it one step at a time. If you're feeling nervous or unsure about what to say, suggest you ask him about himself, and then be a good listener. nothing like being listened to. Hoping it goes well. x
@Softwhispers
I wonder should always take safe road... I wish to spread my wings but everyone just loves to hide behind mask....How to know what's right?!
@Softwhispers
oh wrong post egain