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Traumatic Experiences Community Daily Check-in Friday November 16th

User Profile: CaringBrit
CaringBrit November 16th, 2018

Hey Trauma Community,

So guys i have a topic this week Yay, will be a series of this topic. @MonBon kindly shared the Acceptance discussions with me, so i could base it For Trauma but using her material as a guide.

this One from the Acceptance and Comittment Therapy Discussions, is going to be called Get Untangled From Pain. I understand many of you may struggle, with this lets hope we can defeat this step together.

Here is a Video i would like to Start with on ACT, i couldnt get one directly related to Trauma however, this video is not only audio but a visual presentation to read if you choose to click HERE

ACT can be broken down into 3 areas:

-Mindfulness

-Acceptance

-Value

Some Activities you could try for homework, those that struggle with mindfulness maybe add your journal in, while having a go after you have tried this let me know how it goes next week.

Practice Mindful Eating: Pay attention to all of the sensations that are associated with eating, such as smell, sight, touch, taste, and sound. Be mindful with every bite you take and even of the sensations associated with with swallowing your food.

Practice Mindfulness while Driving: Pay attention to the sights around you, if the radio is playing, the noise your car makes as you accelerate or decelerate, the way the A/C or heater feels against your skin, or any other sensation associated with driving.

Practice Mindfulness while Washing Dishes: Pay attention to what each dish feels like in your hands, the temperature of the water against your skin, the smell of soap, or any other sensation associated with washing the dishes.

Questions to Answer

What does Mindfulness mean to you?

What does Acceptance mean to you?

What does Value mean to you?

Bonus Question: What other activities can you practice mindfulness while doing? Share below.

Of Course the Activity, for these Check-Ins are optional. iust a hello is fine or a normal Check-In.

Also my Guided Discussion is 2pm EST, 7pm GMT in Trauma.Topic this week is Session Three - The Denial of Trauma and abuse. Teen Trauma Discussion 6pm EST Tuesday topic Witnessing with Domestic Abuse

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User Profile: CaringBrit
CaringBrit OP November 16th, 2018

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User Profile: conscientiousPineapple1782
conscientiousPineapple1782 November 16th, 2018

@CaringBrit

https://www.youtube.com/watch?time_continue=267&v=04PK6uIfae0

I miss my pet... I miss it so much...lstening songs that remand me on how I feel that lost my pet.

I miss it I miss it I miss it I miss it

2 replies
User Profile: Hoxenos
Hoxenos November 16th, 2018

@conscientiousPineapple1782

Losing a pet is like losing a family member, I think. It can be so painful. Often people say that we should move on and need to stop grieving eventually, but sometimes it feels just as fresh out of nowhere for no reason. There is no normal way to grieve. There is no normal way to miss. Perhaps taking some time to just let yourself FEEL is needed today. Be kind to yourself, you deserve it *hugs*

User Profile: CaringBrit
CaringBrit OP November 17th, 2018

@conscientiousPineapple1782 sorry for delay in reply was unwell aww losing a pet is very hard

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User Profile: crimsonLime6525
crimsonLime6525 November 16th, 2018

@CaringBrit just saying hi. Probably won

2 replies
User Profile: Hoxenos
Hoxenos November 16th, 2018

@crimsonLime6525 You know yourself best, so do what you feel is right. Sometimes 7cups offers relief, and sometimes it feels like too much. Do whatever you need today to get through. We're here with you :)

User Profile: CaringBrit
CaringBrit OP November 17th, 2018

@crimsonLime6525 take all the time you need sorry for delay in reply was unwell

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User Profile: Hope7879
Hope7879 November 16th, 2018

@CaringBrit

hey I dont really accept things for like myself like i cant accept whats happened I want reasons why...
there was another girl and i want to know why or if i knew her ... like idk ...
i was suspended 2 days ago for some stupid stuff mainly i was upset and ended up swearing at a teacher...
i havent had a good week im still grounded and i spent all yesterday on our day off crying in bed and in the shower and writing poems .... i just really hate things right now...

2 replies
User Profile: Hoxenos
Hoxenos November 16th, 2018

@Hope7879 Acceptance isn't a switch that you can turn off or on, unfortunately. I think it's more of a process that takes time and deliberate work. Sometimes it's work you want to do, and sometimes you might actively not want to do it. I also believe that acceptance isn't necessarily possible or necessary for everyone. I, for instance, can accept what happened sometimes, and other times... I wish I could be a different person. I think this is natural, and life is what we make of it in any given moment. Do you WANT to accept, or do you think you need some time before you're ready for that question. You are allowed to make your choices and have control over this. We are here with you through the journey :)

User Profile: CaringBrit
CaringBrit OP November 17th, 2018

@Hope7879 sorry for delay in reply was unwelli agree with how hoxenos puts it

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User Profile: AmalieAnne
AmalieAnne November 16th, 2018

I bookmarked the video (was kind of up early and my brain has decided to not work all that well right now)

What does Mindfulness mean to you?

Being in the moment, sad, happy, grummpy or other emotions. But also enjoy in a weird way that I am feeling that way or just being that because I have a reason to be sad or happy, sometimes grumpy but that kind of happens because of hormones and stuff. So if I am grumpy talking to people or blanket time. Not thinking about what might happen but trusting that I (with help maybe) can get through it.

What does Acceptance mean to you?

I am who I am, that is it. Also I want to throw away labels like LBGTQ now there is an I but not sure what that means (Other labels apply in the same way) I will give anyone a hug if they would like one and I do not care what label you have or want to have. Everyone is a person first so that is the most important part of acceptance. (P.S. if people are mean or cruel to you because you have a label I will kick them for being fools)

What does Value mean to you?

I might get this one wrong. Accepting that I have value, like being the best at rolly-pollies. Everyone has value (unless they are fools and cannot think for themselves). I like it when people disagree with me because I learn, so they have a lot of value. Er....

Bonus Question: What other activities can you practice mindfulness while doing? Share below.

Playing the violin, listening to music, doing some artwork, reading a good book, going away somewhere in my head. These are things which hopefully no other thoughts will come into my head (sometimes they force their own way in). We are going shopping later because of 'Black Friday' it is -7 outside (in old people temperature 19.4 Fahrenheit), me no like cold. But we put songs on in the car and sing alone (no public performances).

2 replies
User Profile: CaringBrit
CaringBrit OP November 17th, 2018

@AmalieAnne sorry for delay in reply was unwell..i love your responses to the questions great job

1 reply
User Profile: AmalieAnne
AmalieAnne November 20th, 2018

@CaringBrit Hope you are feeling better

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User Profile: SentientiaPoecile
SentientiaPoecile November 16th, 2018

@CaringBrit

What does Mindfulness mean to you?

Experiencing what's happening around me right now, rather than mulling over things in my head. Being aware of the good and bad things I'm feeling, without dwelling on them too much, noticing them without judging myself for feeling that way. Letting myself feel whatever without trying to immediately push it away (but letting it go after a bit is ok).

What does Acceptance mean to you?

Just letting something be what it is, not wishing for it to be different, or rebelling against it too much. I can find a way to work with something or around it while still accepting things for the way they are. Maybe trying to figure out what I can learn from everything.

What does Value mean to you?

Something that's important to you, without taking into account other people's values or society's.

Bonus Question: What other activities can you practice mindfulness while doing?

Anything really. But it's a constant process of pulling myself back out of my head over and over.

4 replies
User Profile: Hoxenos
Hoxenos November 16th, 2018

@SentientiaPoecile

Really great introspection. I love seeing the different feelings and definitions. It's interesting how these words have different meanings to different people. I wonder if I've ever made an assumption based on my definitions about what other people are discussing.

I like what you said about acceptance, about not wanting to change things. It is so difficult to get to that point. I feel like I will always wonder what things could have been like, but at the same time, this kind of thinking does not benefit me. Only things within my control and in the future can be changed. Acceptance is so tricky!

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User Profile: CaringBrit
CaringBrit OP November 17th, 2018

@SentientiaPoecile sorry for delay in reply was unwelland definetly loved your meanings

1 reply
User Profile: SentientiaPoecile
SentientiaPoecile November 17th, 2018

@CaringBrit

No problem :) Thanks for writing back. Hope you're feeling better.

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User Profile: Hoxenos
Hoxenos November 16th, 2018

@CaringBrit

I left for a few months because of self care. Where is everyone? Why have so many diligent and caring Listeners left Trauma? I see that the old tag list is still being used despite no way to change it? You should always link the form so people can be added or removed from the tag list if they want to be. For now, please remove me manually. In fact, with so many changes in the community, you should really start with a fresh list. Logging in to see 100+ notifications is really overwhelming.

1 reply
User Profile: CaringBrit
CaringBrit OP November 17th, 2018

@Hoxenos kate handels the removing we dont have access to the form its all manual

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User Profile: Lexloveslife
Lexloveslife November 16th, 2018

@CaringBrit

To me, mindfulness means being aware of your surroundings in the present moment. Acceptance: non-judgementally accepting feelings of myself and others; accepting the realities / truths for myself, accepting that others may have different realities or truths, and accepting it is okay for my feelings, truths, and realities to not align with others'. It doesn't make my opinions, feelings, etc less valid, and it doesn't make another person's opinions, feelings, etc less valid. Value, I'm still not sure what that means for me.

I also have a question about mindfulness that I don't want to ask in the forum. Can I PM it to you?

2 replies
User Profile: SentientiaPoecile
SentientiaPoecile November 16th, 2018

@Lexloveslife

I like how you mentioned that or doesn't make your or others' opinions less valid. That's very true.

User Profile: CaringBrit
CaringBrit OP November 17th, 2018

@Lexloveslife sorry for delay in reply was unwell and love those answers sure pm me

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User Profile: practicalIdeal2007
practicalIdeal2007 November 16th, 2018

@CaringBrit

Hi Brit

2 replies
User Profile: CaringBrit
CaringBrit OP November 17th, 2018

@practicalIdeal2007 hey deal how are you

1 reply
User Profile: practicalIdeal2007
practicalIdeal2007 November 17th, 2018

@CaringBrit

I am struggling, but trying to be okay. It was a long day.

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User Profile: Wakeboarder222
Wakeboarder222 November 16th, 2018

Hello

Yesterday was a day that had some times that were way better than average for me. That was fantastic. I felt like a real person.

Today is not so good. I keep feeling like I dont want to be here and I dont even know why. I mean, I will be here because I know thats the right thing to do. But I am struggling very much today without what is the purpose of my existence and how am i any good to anyone?!?

it really hurts today. Ive had some bad flashbacks lately and theres a lot of noise in my head, dont know what actually happened and what was just things that I was really afraid of. It was so long ago and I was so young. All I know is it a makes me feel sick, thinking that some of those things may have happened to me. Brings up a lot of feelings of self hatred I guess. Im trying but its hard right now.

1 reply
User Profile: CaringBrit
CaringBrit OP November 17th, 2018

@pioneeringBanana1598 aww i understand how you feel life is like a rollercoaster

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