Traumatic Experiences Community Daily Check-in Tuesday 8th August 2017
Good morning all!
Just a few refelctions today, following on from the marathon and pacing oneself. Its easy to put pressure on oneself, to do more to push through this, to say "I shoiud have got over this by now." Or to punish oneself, (the inner critic drives this) and say "I'm a failure and a disappointment." Or to isolate oneself from a sense of unworthiness and say "I don't deserve to have this help." So how can we continue on this marathon despite all the obstacles that may come in the way. Suggest this quote could help:
"I am doing the best I can with what I have at this moment. This is all I can expect from anyone, including myself."
If we can say this to ourselves, I'm doing "as best I can" we are treating ourselves with kindness and patience, just as we do with others.
So what are you doing today "as best as you can"? How do you think saying this to youself would help? What tells you that you have treated yourself with kindness and patience recently? Maybe you just want to say hi! This is your space and a safe place. x
@rozie
*still scared so hides* but hi
@sensitiveShade5337
hi Shade.. glad you popped out to see us. x
@rozie
hehe xd
@sensitiveShade5337 Hi Shade :)
@melliotm
hi 👋
@sensitiveShade5337
Hi
@MKJart
hiya 👋
"I am doing the best I can with what I have at this moment. This is all I can expect from anyone, including myself."
Going to keep repeating this today, starting now, as I struggle to fall back asleep after a broken night spent trying not to worry about an appointment later this morning that is one giant trigger.
"I am doing the best I can with what I have at this moment. This is all I can expect from anyone, including myself."
@melliotm
Keep it going ... you're doing as best you can.. and that's good!
This is a safe place...and I especially need to feel safe at the moment. 😢
@melliotm
Hugs :)
@rozie
Hey! Thank you for the amazing quote and the thought-provoking questions
I'm surviving as best as I can. I'm taking it slow, trying to find help and help myself. I think maybe just acknowledging that I'm doing okay with all the crap the world has given me would help me stop denying it. I'm healing physically, and I found an amazing person who's helping me eat again and gain weight. They brought me to the realization that if I lost any more, I would die. My organs would fail. No more "10 pounds lower" goals. No more "I'll eat next week". I now have an accountability partner. And I'm really happy and proud of myself for that, which is something I never feel. But anyways, life has taken a turn for the better
finally!
@SemicolonSurvivor
It's great that you have an accountability partner👍I am really pleased for you, and yes you should be proud of yourself, well done😊
@Amandisa16
thanks 😊
@SemicolonSurvivor
Oh that is so good to hear.. that you are happy and proud of yourself over this and that you have a partner alongside you. And its not easy to turn this around but taking care of your physical health will make a difference with everything else. Well done!
I just got written up for what happened on Friday because the chaplain went and filed a complaint with the administrator. I actually had a really good morning before work, and now I'm just done. I hate this. So much. This is so unfair.
@BeeLeigh Aww Bee ❤️❤️⛺⛺ big hugs. I'm so sorry.
@melliotm
I kinda wish I didn't have therapy tonight 😞
@melliotm
I guess be careful what you wish for 😕
@BeeLeigh
I'm so sorry love 
stay strong and keep fighting. You've made it this long. It is hard right now but you got this 
Thanks, @SemicolonSurvivor. It's a struggle right now for sure 😞
@BeeLeigh
So sorry Bee. Remember that a piece of paper doesn't define your worth AT ALL! Hang in there.
Mary
@MKJart
It could affect my ability to pay rent though if I get written up again because of this stupid chaplain. I'm trying today❤️
@SemicolonSurvivor @melliotm @TreesandWine @MKJart
Today started off so well, and I came to work in such a good mood, and now I'm back to crying at my desk because it seems like no matter what I do or how hard I try, I get screwed over 😢😔
@BeeLeigh
Oh Bee this sounds so ttough for you as you say unfair. Do hope you can talk it through with your therapist. We are sitting here with you. ..hugs
@rozie
I feel so betrayed. There were four other people in that meeting with me on Friday. Two chaplains and two social workers. One of the chaplains and one of the social workers know how much I've been struggling. But all four of them went to the administrator. I don't even wanna go to work anymore. I don't understand how they could do that to me. 😢😔
@BeeLeigh 
@melliotm ❤️
@BeeLeigh hugs. Hope the therapy helped a little.
@rozie
Hi Rozie, Yes, I am doing the best I can. Today, I'll try to stay as focused as I can on getting something done that I don't particularly enjoy, yet I need to do it. I know once I start, I'll be fine, it's the starting when you wish you didn't have to do it. I can think of many other things I'd rather be doing, yet I spend more time avoiding doing this than it would actually take me to just do it. So my goal- At least work four hours on it today and see how far I can get.
@MKJart
Hi Mary.. good for you in sticking with this. Know how it is, I can be very creative in avoiding soemthing, but usually when you do settle to it, turns out not so bad. Hoping is goes well for you.. x
@MKJart Best wishes and hugs to you, dear Mary 💟
Hoi hoi alle. I'm Raven, its nice to meet you. I just joined this community today, and I wanted to say hi :)
The one thought on my mind rite now is one of my favourite quotes, "Having a messed up reaction, to a messed up situation, doesn't nescessarily mean your messed up!"
@Raveninthelabrynth
Hi Raven and welcome...glad you have joined us here. And thank you for sharing your quote. We all need encouragement, and quotes can spesk to us and give us something to hold on to.
@Raveninthelabrynth
Welcome!
@Raveninthelabrynth Welcome, Raven -- great quote :)
@Raveninthelabrynth
Hi Raven! I love your quote!!
I have been treating myself with kindness and patience tonight after my binge. I have made a lot of progress with using compulsive eating to "soothe" / numb me. Tonight, I compulsively had a (small) binge. I let it go for a while, and then made a decision to stop. I am being kind and patient with myself, and because of it, I was able to see the reason why I had binged. I had gotten to where I felt overwhelmed, because I WAS doing so well, I started feeling pressure (oh my gosh I am going to have to keep up this new behavior for the rest of my life) and I think that spiraled me into actually doing a binge. So I resolved to practice doing my best to take it day by day, focus on the moment.
wow, upon re-reading that... I had a realization that compulsive bingeing doesn't actually "soothe" me... it numbs me. I finally see the difference (because I have been able to experience it) between soothing and numbing....
@singercrystalspirit
Wow that's quite a breakthrough for you Singer! Its been a way of coping, and now you recognize that the bingeing is numbing rather than soothing,there's an opportunity to find some other ways to self-soothe. x
@rozie
Thank you!! It's rather scary, as it involves total lifestyle changes...
@singercrystalspirit
Yes naturally it is scary, so take it easy and be gentle with yourself.
@rozie
Thank you :) Sometimes I wonder if I'll be so scared that I won't actually change.