Introduce yourself to the Domestic Abuse Support Community

I'm experiencing domestic violence whole my life. My mother was always so abusive but we're going on psychotherapy and it gets better slowly. So, hello everyone :)

Growing up I witnessed many women suffering abuse, most often in silence; right from the household help to my friend who is a professor in a reputed college.
I am a staunch believer in equality and unreasonable power and control infuriate me. I am a trained domestic violence counselor, I have worked with several victims of DV. Each story is different but the power and the pain equation is the same.
DV is a global epidemic and can be removed only if it is de-stigmatized and the victims are encouraged to speak up. Hearing one victim's story encourages the other to share and we create a continuous sharing stream. If victims are not afraid to speak up, abusers will hold back.
I look forward to some solid community participation this month to provide support and awareness about DV, not only on 7 Cups but on other channels outside as well.
#speakup

I'm so afraid to do anything. Up until now it's been mostly verbal abuse and threats from my mom. But today my dad picked me up and shoved me. People have given me numbers to call but I'm too afraid to because the last time I called CPS for neglect and verbal abuse they sent a cop who repeat insulted and disrespected me. He told me I was dumb and the same thing my mother told me "you don't need to see a doctor unless you're dying." I have no health insurance and I struggle to get to doctors appts because of my parents. I've had an infection for over three months now. I kind of hope it spreads and does kill me so I don't have to put up with them anymore and so I can be an example of kids in abusive homes who are scared to reach out because of their experiences with people like that cop. My mother insults and disrespects me on a regular basis. When she was sick she told me to come over to her so she could get me sick. She'll wave her hand at me and say "shoo shoo go away." Like I'm a dog. I'm meaning less to my parents. I'm just a piece of property to them for them to treat like crap. I'm tired of it. I'm tired of being invalidated and mocked. I don't know if I should wait until Monday at school to tell a teacher about what happened today or call someone. Like I said I'm afraid to take action because of the results last time. Please help.

Just come to the realisation that over the last 4years I've been emotionally abused. Feel very lonely & upset I even let it happen. I've always been a tough cookie. I can't get away from the abuser we have a child together otherwise I'd of run for the hills a long time ago. A recent event where someone was malicious to me for no reason, made me regress. I feel I can't trust anyone & in being alone with it I realised what's been happening. To the point now I can see it happening like a text book. Only yesterday I was blasted angrily on the phone for not being a good parent because my child got an earache. The next day I was being told I was too sensitive, that his anger was all in my head. That's just the tip of the iceberg. I did think a while back he had a borderline personality disorder, it was all too crazy...but saw it from his point of view not mine. From what Ive read that's typical too. Trying to help him when I should of been helping myself.

I do need counselling or talking therapy, it's getting harder. Can anyone help?

DV is more complicated than just speaking out about it. Many complex reasons behind it and not so easy to solve. Sorry but my experience only taught me that no one really gives a s***

I have been in an abusive marriage for over twenty years. It wasn't until five or six years ago that I realized I was being abused. Up to that point the abuse was only emotional and verbal. When I started the process of trying to leave the abuse became physical and that completely broke me as a human being. Having grown up with a very violent dad and experienced many other forms of abuse i think I have gotten to the point I can no longer take it. Spend a lot of time completely dissociated from the world. My mental health has been destroyed to a point I am unsure if I will ever be well again and this alone has hindered my ability to try to leave again. Some days I feel very hopeless and wonder why I have been subjected to abuse by everyone in my life. As bad as all of this sounds, I have not given up completely and never will. I will continue to do all I can to help myself in hopes of being able to one day leave and start my life over.

my dad has abused my mom, my sister, and me

my sister has moved out, but im not old enough yet

we're poor and can't do much

Hi I'm new here! Don't really know how it works. I'm out of my violent relationship now, I've been out of it for a long time and I'm still finding the recovery process very difficult. I'm still very scared all the time even though there's no threat. I relive a lot of what happened to me. Although I feel like I'm coping well I'm glad there's support here for my recovery because I've always felt very alone in this because I don't know anyone who's gone through this epically so young.

Hello everyone. I almost feel ashamed to post here, for I have no room to talk. I was never abused myself, but I saw it with misty eyes growing up. My mother suffered abuse by her boyfriends...

It began at a much younger age than I can remember. In fact, I didn't know about it until only a month ago. My mom told me she was my father's first victim... Of course now, it all makes sense. I was an unwanted child. She wanted to have an abortion, but that man begged her not to.

After a lengthy divorce, we settled down with a man who happened to live on the same road as my father (small world, eh?). I cannot describe him in nicer words when I say he was an abusive, alcoholic piece of ****. That was a terrifying time for all of us, and I don't know if I could find it in my heart to forgive him - despite the fact that my family now accepts him as a friend. I remember one time, he took the glass center out of our kitchen table and tossed it across the room. Somehow I managed to sleep through that fight, but, when I awoke, I kept asking why we no longer had a table. My mother tried to pretend that it wasn't a big deal, but I knew something was wrong when she shared the story with our relatives.

There was an even worse night than that one - a night where I couldn't sleep at all. I had just gone to bed, when I was awoken by the bedroom door being opened. My mother hurried in and locked it. She was drunk, and exhausted. At the time, she had been working two 10-hour shifts back to back, because her boyfriend had no job and we were low on money. He would often accuse her of having an affair during the long hours she was away. That night, she climbed up to the top bunk and passed out on my bed. I tried to wake her, but she wouldn't get up. Before falling asleep, she had mumbled something about a lamp falling on her head. I remember staying up that night, my body aching with worry. I rested on the floor, while getting up every few minutes to use the restroom.

That was in kindergarten. The year was 2005, or 2006. I don't remember when exactly, but I was only 5. 9 years later, my mother found herself in a horrible relationship. This wasn't like 2005, where she simply pretended it didn't exist. No. I knew what was happening, and I knew how much pain she was in.

The man abused her. He would call her terrible names, knock her down, punch holes in the doors, choke her... I've found it easier to try and forget what happened, instead of allowing myself to heal from the trauma. Every time they were together, I would find myself eagerly pressing my ear to my bedroom door. I constantly waited for some sign that they were arguing. I was always so, so worried about her, but she refused to let me call the police! When they fought, I knew that man wouldn't hurt her as bad if I could witness it. She'd always have bruises on her, but he wouldn't touch her if I was in the room. That's why, as soon as I could hear them yell, I would be out of my room and down the hall in seconds. I'd hover in the kitchen doorway and listen to the awful things they said. As soon as he'd leave, I would run to my mother and wrap her in my arms. There was nothing else I could do.

One day, my mother became pregnant. She was so excited to have a baby... Yet, the man wouldn't let her. He MADE her get an abortion! He said he would KILL her if she didn't!!

...There is a happy ending to this surprisingly recent story. Several months ago, after having dated the man for a year, my mother finally stepped up and told him to leave. A year before, he was homeless and had no place to go. In a year, he was let into our home, cost my mother her job, abused his dog so bad he was taken away, got another dog, abused that one, abused my mother, put holes in every door, and gave me enough fear to never want to be around a man again. Yet, here's the happy ending. In mid 2015, my mother kicked him out of the house. She gave him money to move across the United States to live with his mother. We haven't seen him since, and our lives have gotten much happier.

If you're having a bad situation at home, please, listen to my next words. I will say this from the bottom of my heart. I love you. I care about you so, so much. You are beautiful in every way, and nothing that's happened to you is your fault. You deserve to be happy. For those recovering, I hope you are doing well, and I hope there is a place in your heart that can be mended and healed. If you're still in a tough situation, I really, really hope you find a way out. My first advice would be to contact the authorities or a person you love. If you cannot do that, then, please, stay strong. Just wait a little longer. It will all be over soon.

I love you. Have a great day.

I have been experiencing abuse for the past 5-6 years. Started verbally which it still is and then move to physical although it has reverted back to verbal. At times I feel numb then like I'm crumbling inside and this small voice (myself) is begging to come out. It's complicated because I have 3 daughters all with autism who constantly need supervision. He plays this game with me to make me extremely anxious to the point of where I breakdown emotionally and then start to wonder if I'm crazy...I am trying to make small goals so I can get out...be independent and be the best mom for my girls...