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LGTBQ+ & Domestic Abuse - Share Your Story, Say Hello

User Profile: Laura
Laura October 1st, 2015

Are you a part of the LGBTQ+ community, and faced domestic abuse? Share your story and receive support here.

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User Profile: Anomalia
Anomalia May 10th, 2016

*bump*

User Profile: secretLime4353
secretLime4353 July 24th, 2016

Don't know if any1 else is in the same situation.

I'm in a 3 year relationship & recently engaged 2 a drug & alcohol addict. It has been suggested by my counsellor that he is bordering on being a narcissist. He constantly subjects me 2 emotional abuse. It's heartbreaking cos we could b so good 2gether as we were when we 1st fell in love & yet for the past year / 18 months he keeps pushing me away. He doesn't know how 2 handle love. He's got a lot going on in his past & just can't get over this. His main problem is denial. Denial of everything. I've asked him 2 leave our home 3 times but he keeps coming back. It's so hard. I love him so much. Want 2 help him & b there 4 him so take him back. I know he will never change & only he can help himself.
Any advice from ex addicts or people suffering the same would b so much appreciated. I just don't understand Wots going on in his head. I know wot I should do & ive done that but cos of our feelings 4 each other keeping him out of my life seems & is proving impossible. I live in dread of the Fone ringing or door bell ringing giving me bad news about his welfare. Feel more crazy than all this sounds. Thank u 4 listening.
2 replies
User Profile: PhoenixPatronus
PhoenixPatronus March 31st, 2017

@secretLime4353 hello. I'm so sorry to hear about what you're going through. Situations like that can be really tough. I've never been through it myself, but I have a friend who currently is as well, and see how hard it can be for her.

I may not first hand what you are dealing with, but know if you ever need someone to listen, I am here for you. I wish you all the best x

User Profile: Darcshaver
Darcshaver April 25th, 2019

@secretLime4353 yea i went through emotional abuse and had to come to terms with the fact that hewasn't gonna change. Keep suggesting counselling to him and NA and youre ginna try cause you love him but if he doesnt try for u, you need to start worrying about your own wellbeing. He needs to work on himself for u cause youre worth more:)

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User Profile: JasperJ
JasperJ January 7th, 2018

I am a survivor of domestic violence (married 8 years and lived in a foreign country). 2 years after I left my ex and my foreign home, I got a job in domestic violence as an advocate and I may have overestimated my readiness for this field. I'm regularly triggered and I also think the weight of what I do all day is affecting my personal life. I need resources. At the same time, I AM the resource. So where do I go for my own support? I was on here hoping to talk to someone who understands. Looks like these threads have been inactive a long time but I would love to connect with someone here.

1 reply
User Profile: HopeHaddingMSWLCSW
HopeHaddingMSWLCSW January 8th, 2018

@JasperJ I would like to say that I admire your insight! You seem to have processed your own feelings and thinking about this issue to the point that you asked for help when you needed it. This may not sound like much, but it is a big deal! I also admire your willingness to help others with something that had to have been very diffiicult for you to cope with yourself. Being a resource to others does not mean that you do not need your own resources. This is why so many therapist are in therapy! We all need a little help every now and then and there is nothing wrong with this. Learning how to cope with a long term abusive relationship is not an easy thing to do, as I'm sure you already know. Seeking help to work through your own potention cognitive distortions about the relationship will help a great deal. Finding a supportive listener will also help a lot. I wish you well with this and hope that you find the help you are looking for. :)

User Profile: Darcshaver
Darcshaver April 25th, 2019

@JasperJ hey are u still on here? I suffer d domestic abuse too and now i want to be a counsellor. That makes sense that youre triggered and need help even when youre the one thats helpingothers

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User Profile: alicia81706
alicia81706 April 27th, 2018

Hi everyone. My names Alicia. Im a 31-yr-old lesbian and am fairly new to this app. Im the mother of a beautiful little 11-yr-old who has cerebral palsy and developmentally is a lot like a blind newborn. He can smile and laugh though!

Ive struggled with anxiety and depression my entire life. I have a huge tender heart, and sometimes it makes me miserable! I joined this app because Im dealing with the aftermaths of dating an abusive narcissist. She was physical once, but all the emotional and verbal abuse makes that seem like nothing. It would be best to go no contact with her... but I havent found the strength to do so. I feel like I am grossly trauma-bonded at this point. The past six months have hands down been the worst of my life, and things dont seem to be getting better. Id love any sort of support at this point!

User Profile: easyLime118
easyLime118 August 18th, 2020

In my case I am the wrong doer. My partner and I have been together for 12 years and we have been through hell and back together. We got into a fight a couple days ago. I was angry because of a slight change of plans and we started to argue. I left to walk and cool my head and came to this realization that it was emotional abuse and this has been going on for too long and it's my fault. My partner was crying when I got back. At this moment I decided it can't be like this. He's been way too good all this time and I do not want things to stay like this... So I came here. Got a therapist and I told him I did so that night... There's a lot to work on, but I do not want this to go on and I need to change. Myself, my habits, thoughts and overall work on being mindful and considerate... This is the first step in a thousand miles journey...