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Need advice on parents with addictions

User Profile: Angel628
Angel628 April 22nd

I joined 7cups because I want to have somewhere to vent out all my problems and frustrations.

I have a parent who is struggling with an alcohol addiction they have start arguments with no reason what so ever and they constantly start arguments with my other family members.

This has caused me to not to trust them

That’s why I need some advice on how to handle a parent who is struggling with an alcohol addiction.

3

@Angel628

Must be difficult. Doing good thing when someone does you wrong... love over hate... forgiveness over unforgiveness... love changes people. It must be really difficult, and I don´t know your situation at all but the addiction, depends how bad, it consumes the person and affects their behavior and thoughts and everything... they have problems and need help, really need help. It is hard, but dont take it personally and try to see it, they have problem and it is not really who they are... but need help, they need help, u know? 

User Profile: livingthedream26
livingthedream26 April 22nd

I deal with the same problem. I’m sorry to hear that you’re going through that. My mother drinks a lot, and she’s sometimes aggressive and has a short temper. I often find what works for me is just setting boundaries with her. I don’t talk to her about everything, (well at least this is what I’m working on), if I do talk to her.. I try to keep it surface level…and I keep a therapist. Sometimes parents don’t always know how to relate to us especially when they’re dealing with the reality of their life. But hopefully you can connect with us on here and someone irl to help you with this more. I wish you the best, stay strong :))

User Profile: toughTiger6481
toughTiger6481 April 22nd

@Angel628

      Addicts only seek help or want to get sober when they are ready. 

They do not see the damage they cause in the parent child relationship. They have lost your trust and that is common. There is a chance they will never earn that back.  It is sad when we simply can no longer look up to our parents. If there are other family members involved have you ever had an intervention?    

           Sometimes the cold hard truth that what they are doing is destroying your relationship with them and it is not as easy as blaming a substance as they choose to continue to use.    When we stopped giving them chance after chance or giving them an excuse our person reached a point where being drunk and despised was not what they could tolerate, and they chose to get help and sober.