Abusive roommate
So years ago, I lived with two roommates who I barely knew that I found through a set of wanted adds in roommates. I also had dealt with lots of abuse from other people because I have a disability next to be awkward and quirky.
In the roommate situation, one of them had very low tolerance and obsessive-compulsive traits and because of that, just about everything, I did push her buttons. After the first week, she began nagging at me and putting me on guilt trips until her voice got louder. When I spoke with my counselor about it years ago, I felt like I was walking through that situation again and I could hear my roommate yell at me.
My roommate also didn't like me around and had succeeded at manipulating me one month later by telling me that she was going to have a birthday party at which I was not invited because I was a lot younger than she and the other girl. Again she put me on a guilt trip because I was still under 21 but I would never fit in because that living situation was not the right fit for me or so she said. Like the last time, this roommate's yelling and nasty words made me cry.
@Summershy
Yikes! I am sorry to hear that they treated you so poorly when you were living with them, too. You paid just as much as them and deserved respect. How are you doing now?
@SouthernFlame I have a roommate but she is cat and I would only like to have a cat and especially after being treated so poorly by my roommates. I feel safe knowing I can come home to a meowing cat versus roommates who are going to yell at me everytime I turn around.
When I lived with them back in the day, I would do whatever I could to avoid the one who yelled at me all the time because she was unpredictable.
The other one wasn't as bad but she could put me on guilt trips too, for example, one time I got really drunk at a party she was having and she got mad about that and especially for throwing up in the toilet and I had flushed. Yet, she got drunk all the time
She put it in a note: "I refuse to clean a toilet that someone vomits in. It's your responsibility to clean this and get the bills paid."
@Summershy
Ah an animal is always better than a human, especially an abusive one. I am glad that this abuse is behind you though I can understand it may still hurt to this day.
@SouthernFlame I made bad choices in that living situation too and the more I made, the more frustrated they were with me.
@Summershy
And that must have not been easy to deal with! I am glad you are safe now
@SouthernFlame not it was not and especially from the first roommate who was unpleasant to deal with
@Summershy
i am glad its over and you room with a cat now.
@SouthernFlame it's been many years since I lived there but her behavior was traumatic
@Summershy
Understandable!
@SouthernFlame Because I have an invisible disability, autism, and ADHD, I tend to do things that put others off even though I try to hide it, people often get mad at me every time I turn around. Because of that, I have been in one abusive situation after another.
@Summershy
I am sorry to hear that! No one deserves abuse!
@SouthernFlame I was trying to get away from my parents and I ended up running into more of it with my first roommate who:
1. Agreed to take a roommate 6 years younger than she was and then later made me feel bad because I wasn't in their age group and that since I was legal drinking age, she could not have any parties
2. She made it clear that she didn't want me around because she thought I was "Crazy" because one time I heard her and a boyfriend of the other roommate calling me "Crazy."
Boyfriend: Your roommate is Crazy (Luckily roommate number 2 and him broke up and she started dating someone else who she grew up with who you great)
Roommate number 1: Yeah she's crazy
When she was the one who lied to me about having a birthday party all weekend that I wasn't invited to because her friends were going to be sleeping on the couches drinking. Along with yelling at people just about everytime one would turn around.
@Summershy
wow. :\ she sounds mean tbh. Sorry you had that Experience.
@SouthernFlame both of them are. However, I thought the second one was nicer but she is not because about 10 years ago, I had tried to reach out to her and tell her what was going in my life by attempting to friends her facebook and she blocked me.
Why? I didn't know how to manage my money at the time and write several bad checks including on several utility bills but instead of wanting to reconcile.
However, she was mean to me at the house we lived in by way of being a complete hypocrite because she was a heavy drinker and got drunk on a few occasions. A few months before my lease was about to terminate, she had a Mardi Gras Party which is a drinking holiday and getting drunk. So what do I do? I get drunk and lots of loud noise and "Embarrassed her" in front of her friends, pass out and vomit. How does she react? She gets mad and complains.
1. I could her complaining about me on the phone: "Yeah I just wanted to kick her."
2. She put a note on the counter: "I refuse a clean a toilet after someone vomits in it and don't eat the leftovers I am taking them to work because they are for people who didn't come to the party."
@Summershy
verry sorry that happened. Not nice at all! I can understand how these memories haunt you.
@SouthernFlame I was so hurt when that second roommate turned out to be mean but I ended up having to avoid her more often like the other because I have to accept that this situation was just as toxic as it was with my parents.