Broken spirit
Why do people feel the need to break another person's spirit??. It's almost as if they walk through their lives breaking beautiful innocent humans like it's the only goal they have. They always pick the weaker, more vulnerable people. How many times can one girl be broken and survive? When you have encountered these evil people over and over from a very young age and by people who are supposed to protect you, you stop seeking safe people. These things happen so many times you feel wrong, defective, shameful. Trust is impossible therefore your alone because you cannot trust no matter how hard you try. Surrounded by people but feel completely alone.
ABB
@amiableBlackberry92 I can feel every word you wrote 😞
I hope you're doing okay
Thx for your reply I'm hanging on. It's a very all alone place and I've been living this alone life for a long time.
Alone is different from lonely.
ABB
@amiableBlackberry92 I understand the difference. I hope being here helps you somehow in hanging on ❤
@Optimisticempath
Yes 7 cups has helped me feel like I'm not alone all the time, I can see I'm not the only one suffering here. I'm trying to be strong, reaching out for help. But it's such a long road -healing. I don't know if I will succeed before I reach the other side of this physical life. I am trying, I suppose that's something. I am trying to love myself so I can love others. I just feel so alone inside.
I'm sorry you can relate to my post.
ABB 💜
Hurt people hurt people, but it’s always a conscious choice. I am hurt too by abusive parents and family members and friends too, but I choose not to abuse others. I chose to exercise my free will and the biblical scriptures that teach to “Do unto others what you would like done to you.” I want to be loved and trusted and valued, so I still love and value others. Notice I left out the trust part. You should not trust others until you trust yourself. Meaning, do you care for yourself? Do you know how to keep yourself safe without shutting down? Sometimes this can take years of therapy to learn if you’ve been abused by your parents, the people you are suppose to trust.
I learned how to love myself enough to allow others in if they are trustworthy and keep others out who are not. My close friends are a few honest people. They are the ones who I open up to and allow in to my world. It’s like a boundary that only you can open the door and allow in or not allow in. My heart is not totally closed off today because I can trust my judgement about others. That is loving yourself. Believe me, it took lots of good therapy to get here. Good luck to you!
@amiableBlackberry92
I feel this way too and I'm trying to deal with it. Constantly being stepped on by many. This led me to a very deep depression recently. I decided to isolate myself but my depression kind of got worse. The loneliness from being alone and the countless stabbings brings forth lots of distrust. I do not like the current me at all. The human mind is a wondrous place - so much capabilities and yet so scary.
I was told these advice from older people that tried seeking help from, easier said than done, (1) to tune these people out as white noise, (2) to accept that regardless of what you do, there will always be people who are displeased/jealous, and (3) to accept that its not you, its just who they are.
I tried applying these recently and yea... guess what... they didnt work haha. It feels like theres no way out of these walls... but I'm hoping these mindset changes could help us in the long run.
We cannot control others' actions and thoughts, but we have ourselves. I hope happiness and peace of mind visits you soon :) hang in there!
@Tree7967
I'm sorry you are struggling, I understand these struggles. Your a beautiful deserving person of all the good stuff life has to offer.
Your not alone, therapy helps alot.
Take care and thx for responding it helps me feel not so alone.
ABB💜
@HeartofAloha
Yes I agree with your post. Thx for such great support. I too had decided a long time ago to be kind and decent to others and I raised my kids with the love I didn't get as a child. I am very proud of them ... adults now.
I'm working on myself through therapy good self care and I dumped a really toxic job which helped alot.
I'm still a work in progress because I have had all of the worst happen to me.
Childhood violent abuse.
Sexual assault
Hostile work environment and targeting.
There's more but those are the biggest ones.
I'm better now that I'm working on myself. Thx again for responding it helps alot.
ABB 💜
I was in an abusive 8 year friendship with someone who has Narcissistic Personality Disorder. I didn't know it until she "broke up" with me. It's called a discard. So I learned all about the disorder. One thing she would regularly do is make up something she knew would upset me so that I would spend all day trying to be okay again. It's emotinally regulating for them to watch others struggle with their emotions so that they can feel good that they can control your feelings. It helps them manage their own. After I learned all this, and did a little healing, I interacted with the narcissist again and I was able to also trigger her. I saw how upset I was making her over very mundane things, and I began to understand how doing so gives you a sense of mastery over your own emotions by being able to control someone else's. I in essence became a narcissist. I understand why they do it. It's kind of like setting fire to a city to light your cigarette: it works, it's just that there are too many better ways to get your needs met. Narcissists only have this coping mechanism though- so that's why some people do what they do🤷
I understand every word ... to me the worst part is when they also try to imitate your personality after breaking you ... i would never be able to do that to someone ... its so sick ... disgusting
@Oceanthinking8455
Thank you for you kind post. I agree. Ppl that do these horrible things to other humans are like sharks on land. They sneak up on you in disguise and you don't see their intentions until it's too late and your already broken in half and then you have to find a way to extricate yourself from the hold they have on you and find a way to put yourself back together. Not easy to do. All this healing business is tricky stuff and it's like riding a rollercoaster, you never know if your going up or down on any given day.
I'm sorry you can relate to my post, it tells me I'm not alone in this kind of pain. So many of us out here suffering. It's so difficult to trust or connect.
Best ABB 💜