I have my life and myself
I hate my life.
I’m 25 years old. I already got married and I’m expecting a child.
They are the two biggest mistakes of my life. Irreversible mistakes. There’s nothing that can be done about them. I was very, very stupid. I wish there were a RESET button to restore my whole life.
But there isn’t. You can’t go back. It’s a cage forever.
I’m full of regret. I don’t feel like talking to anyone anymore. I don’t feel like seeing anyone anymore. I wish I could disappear into nothingness. I wish all of this were just a bad dream and that tomorrow everything would vanish. I’ve ruined my entire youth. Maybe my whole life. I’ll be forced to do things I don’t want to do, things that don’t interest me.
This is not what I imagined. This is not the kind of life a 25-year-old is supposed to have. At this age, people usually think about traveling, pursuing the activities they’re passionate about, doing all the things they dreamed about as kids. Buying their dream car.
But of course, nobody can understand this. Everyone is used to monotonous jobs with no stimulation, and they have children just to feel some kind of fulfillment, or out of boredom, because they no longer know what to do with their lives, so children become a goal.
I never felt, and still don’t feel, the need to have children. Not even at an older age, let alone now.
I don’t know what to do. I don’t want any of this. If I could, I would leave everyone and stay alone with myself, doing my own things without anyone bothering me.
At this point, no matter what I do, I won’t get out of this. The cage is closed now…
I feel out of place everywhere. Older people look at me strangely because I’ve done all of this at such a young age. People my age do the same…
Hi @calmHouse2774.
It's terrible that you seem to feel bitter at such a young age.
I hope you can explore your feelings here and find acceptance in this dark situation you find yourself in.
Your post reminds me of the song 🎵 by Devlin called "Rewind."
Good luck, your life isn't over yet🌟
I'm sorry you're feeling like this. Do you have a loving partner?
@calmHouse2774
Hey there. I can understand that the situation is tough. What made you feel like this? Have you ever considered getting help? Maybe a therapist or a marriage counselor?
Hello, i see how you feel now. Trapped,out of breath. The mistakes we count and we did in our past are for making us a better version of us. I know it could sound abit nonsense for you but we all get lessons from what we run away. This is a period of your life that wants to teach you something,try to give yourself questions,find the reason what this wants to teach you. It could be hard for begining but more you start to think,more earlier you ll get the answer. Dont compare yourself with others please, everyone has different speed of life, teaching,getting success. And if social media affects you negatively avoid following fake successful bloggers,focus on you and the ones who did something from zero. You can still make something in your life that will give motivation. Being pregnant is not barrier for it,maybe a hobby, a little business which you can turn it to work. Try to make crisis turn to chance. In future maybe you will think about it and thank this happened to your life ,sometimes we really need to be upset to find a way that makes us happy or bring success. Treat yourself and your baby with compassion,and life/God will answer and prise you. Maybe all you need is this sadness that will make proud,happy in future. And i am sure as woman we are really powerful, we give life to this world. You can create also your very best version,i believe you, dont lose your hope. 😊🤍
I have been trapped. I'm here to listen without judgement. You just need to focus on what good things you do have in ur life and amplify. I am happy to hold space.hugs
