One irrational fear that I have is.....

I'm afraid that I may be unstable. Even my marriage is unstable. I'm wondering if I've become too comfortable with such a distant practical situation that I don't know if I'll believe something else could be real or attainable. Anything better may seem " too good to be true" . I'm wanting to test if it is!! But my testing may sabotage what makes me happy. Y does feeling happy feel selfish?!

The future. Something bad happening . Not feeling confident

That i will never be able to lose my weight

That the monster who raped me eight years ago will find me again. Thus I won't add my college or work to my social media and don't really use it anyways but am still scared.

The world around me is falling apart and everyone is shoving me away

That I REALLY am the bad person that family makes me feel that I am

Being alone until i die and everyone treating me like crap until then

That I wont live my life to the fullest

Will my life long goals ever get achieved. I may still be in same way as counsellor said .scared that end of the sessions we wouldn't of got far and her help would of been waste when I tried to explain its not like that. I told her my issues and circumstances with work .Said not be right time .I want to change. I'm not someone who doesn't. I do and ready but maybe I need longer goal time settings to achieve what I want. Maybe this could take more then just twelve weeks. This is making me irratuonir and sad. Please help