One thing I have never told anyone is....[finish this sentence}

I never told anyone how I really feel. Even if I said I am just said they never knew what I have done to my body does to sadness.

I am hurting myself like scratching my legs and arms. I have to hide my tears when i am exhausted after all day of fake smile. I really hate my body and mind. I feel like i am annoying all od my friends and family. I want to talk with them but in the same time i feel like no one wants to listening to me so i stay quiet. I even affraid od posting this.I really sorry for long massege and for my english.

Ok, so I have told one person this but it's still something. I think I might be bi. I know I like guys but I think i may also like girls. I don't know what to do about it to see if i am or not, or if im just supposed to let whatever happens, happen

I often wish I was never born. I don't feel like I'll ever truly heal from the pain I have experienced. No one has a clue just how many bullies there have been, throughout school, jobs, etc. I'm disappointed by the fact that I keep waking the hell up. Many tears fall in silence and solitude.

Anytime I drive my car I think about driving away and never coming back

Last year I had a minor procedure done but it was the first I had to go under anesthesia, I was terrified and some people knew that but what I've never told anyone is when I woke up in a room filled with tons of other kids mostly younger than me and a few older I felt so lonely like I had died because I was the only one awake. I kept trying to at least sit up and a nurse had to calm me down even though I knew what was going on I still panicked.

I self harm, in lots of different ways. I find the pain of self harming, stops the pain, I feel inside. My family do not understand my problems, and don't want to hear about them, as they say it's stupid. Well not for me.

The one thing I have never told anyone is I think I fell in love with my sadness my depression I dont know why maybe because I feel Im love with the poetic thoughts it gives also I think self harm isnt a bad thing I think is just a release of emotions

*quietly raises hand*

im not straight. 🏳️‍🌈

or into intimacy. ♦️

sometimes i doubt my own existence,

and wonder how to wake up from this dream called life.

And somedays I want to run,

far into the setting sun,

but i dont.

im here

im real.

im me.

hello.

(just some words from my heart)

I bottle up

my emotions in fear of hurting the people I love with my real emotions