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Why do families argue and fight with each other?

28 Answers
Last Updated: 04/05/2021 at 5:57am
1 Tip to Feel Better
United Kingdom
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Tara Davis, Doctorate in Counselling Psychology


I have worked successfully with a wide range of difficulties. Nothing is more important than developing a warm, compassionate relationship with someone you can trust

Top Rated Answers
July 21st, 2015 10:32pm
Because they care. If someone didn't care about you, they wouldn't bother telling you what to do with your life. They wouldn't bother trying to get your grades up or make sure your doing the right things in life.
December 14th, 2015 6:37am
There are incidents in life when you really can not control the circumstances around you. In these situations, family members have this centre problem and other issues of their own and sometimes life does not give us time to solve them all in an orderly fashion. Then we get angry and frustrated when things dont seem to be going smoothly like the way we want them to and lash out at each other. We have to remember to calm down in these scenarios, feel strong enough to deal with all of this instead of arguing and fighting with each other. We might thing our problem is the hardest to cope with but others feel the same way about their problems too.
January 27th, 2015 7:36pm
Everyone is an individual with different ideas and views. This world would be boring if we all were programmed the same way. I think it's important for families to have open communication. When there are disagreements, it's important to consider the other's views and try to reach compromise. A happy family is loving, accepting and non-judgemental.
May 10th, 2015 3:21am
Families are based upon individuals forced together through blood. These individuals are not involved with each other not by choice, but by birth. They have to deal with each other and their differences. They also have to deal with each others' levels of growth and maturity, as well as each others' different goals, wants, and needs. No matter how different they may be, they also have to live under the same roof and share the same space. Other than family, only the best of friends or involved individuals live together, and that is by choice. Living with an individual so different than oneself is a challenge. Every human wants to have choice and freedom, but in order to keep a family together, sometimes humans have to forfeit that luxury. For example, parents often fight with their children because the children do not want to do chores, or whatnot. Families must work together, but it often takes arguing, and even maturity, before they can see each others' perspective.
April 28th, 2015 1:47am
They aren't on the same page. They need to establish goals toward which they can work together. This is the first step. The rest comes naturally.
May 15th, 2015 1:24pm
Just the same as each of us are all so diverse and complex, our personalities clash, our opinions differ, our beliefs and morals shape us into the person we are, the same goes with family too. There are 7 billion individuals on the planet, it is natural for us not to get along with others sometimes. It's normal for families to argue and disagree! Healthy even. If you're finding that it's a daily occurrence and it's not being dealt sensibly, safely and/or abusive speech is being made, there might be cause for concern but generally, everyone is bound to meet in an argument with someone else at some point. :)
May 28th, 2015 1:01am
That what families do! Yeah they share there ups and downs. Have lots of fun and laughs, share smiles. Nobody's perfect, every family fights
January 25th, 2016 1:43am
families consist of different people. different people = different opinions. I cant think of one family that is perfect and doesnt fight or argue occasionally. think about it, if we were all the same how boring would it be?!
January 22nd, 2015 10:08pm
They're unhappy or they don't agree with one another. You may feel this way with another family member at some point, but always love them.
December 20th, 2016 5:45am
Families are usually close due to time spend together and the experiences they've endured , therefore it's easy to express emotions & differering opinions to your family which can lead to argurements. Also , people tend to release negative emotions on their family at times because they don't know where else too and they believe their family will still be there regardless.
May 23rd, 2017 4:53am
When there is love, there will be fights and arguments, because when you really think about it, it's most usually rooted from care. All relationships consist of arguments and fights, and there is no such thing as a perfect relationship where you don't argue at all. What that leads to is a day where you'll burst out with your bottled up frustration and unresolved issues. So in a way, it's good that families argue.
June 22nd, 2015 4:53pm
Sometimes, families take that anger and annoyance out on people they care the most about. Sometimes it may because families care so much they just want the best for you and don't want to see you upset from making an bad decision.
July 26th, 2016 3:16am
Families argue and fight with each other as they have a difficult time expressing that they want better for each other/ bad communication skills.
August 21st, 2017 5:25am
Families argue and fight with each other because they don't understand. They don't understand why somebody else did something. Or they have different opinions and they don't know how to express them.
July 26th, 2016 6:56pm
In families there are many similar characters who easily clash, this augmented to too much time together and the expectations we place on our loved ones often leaves tension.
October 30th, 2017 9:39am
Let me answer that in two quotes from my fav. show: “Once a wise man told me, ‘Family don’t end in blood,’ but it doesn’t start there either. Family cares about you. Not what you can do for them. Family is there, for the good, bad, all of it. They got your back. Even when it hurts. That’s family.” -DW “Are you under the impression that family’s supposed to make you feel good?! Make you an apple pie maybe? They’re supposed to make you miserable! That’s why they’re family.” -BS
June 23rd, 2015 3:04pm
Families live together and are almost always together so it's normal for them to get on eachothers nerves. When you're together with someone all the time, I garantuee you you'll get annoyed by certain personality traits of that person. And it's normal!
September 7th, 2015 3:18am
All families are different and no family is perfect. This is not a one answer fits all question. However realize that most families will have differences and disagreements. And its normal. It only should become a problem if the fights and arguments turn physical or abuse is an issue. If that is the case, please seek help with a trusted person who can help you and your family.
July 19th, 2016 1:38am
When you put so many heads in one house it is not easy for everyone to agree on the same things. Everyone will have their own opinions and decisions and they argue not because they want to fight but because they care of what the other understands about them.
February 7th, 2017 10:56pm
That's the human tendency, we fight over stuff when its clearly not needed but some fights are essential for the families that makes them stronger and united. We all cannot have a bright sunshine family and jolly all the time.
April 24th, 2018 9:42pm
When families fight, there is obviously some tension between them. It usually started off from a small problem, then arguments expand around the house, and only create more tension between everybody. Think of it as building a sand castle. You keep building it up, but it all falls down eventually. Sometimes a bit at a time. That is what these sort of arguments are like. Things can get better, trust me. Just relax, and maybe consider family therapy or meetings with rules
July 30th, 2018 9:56pm
We all expect so much from each other, especially our family members that when we do not receive the answer we were anticipating we argue. We argue hard because we know what buttons to push and we expect to be forgiven for our behavior since we are family. It is absolutely normal for families to fight, we are human and all experience the same feelings and emotions, some more than others. It is good to say what is on your chest at the time but just remember do not take it too far, words are never forgotten but a bruise will heal.
January 27th, 2015 7:29pm
It's very normal for families to argue, as there is usually a lot of tension for some reason. This is always something different, as every situation is different, but in the end it's often because they disagree over something, and the tension gets build up when they are around each other very often and continue to disagree.
July 21st, 2015 10:52pm
Sometimes families argue and fight with each other because they love each other. It could also be from jealously. It could be from anything really. Families are like friends and sometimes when you fight with your friend, you make up and sometimes you don't that's the same with family.
August 13th, 2019 9:47pm
Families argue with each other due to a number of disagreements and problems that seperate them emotionally and causes them to grow distant. In my experience, my family argued because my dad dealt with mental illness which caused him to be aggressive in his tone of voice towards me, my mom and members of the family. This caused me and my siblings to feel seperated and angered by his words, even if his words were unintentional and occured as a result of his battle with bipolar disorder. Ultimately, families may also argue with each other due to mistrust in the relationship of the parents which may often lead to divorce. This further seperates families, because when the kids are forced to live seperate lives with their parents, they can feel resentment and anger with their parents decision to seperate.
April 5th, 2021 5:57am
When there's more than 1 people involved, there can be difference in opinions, shaped on everyone's personal experiences and thoughts, especially in a family, where generation gap is involved too , different members of the family have their own beliefs, expectations and needs from themselves and from each other . It may get to a point when there's disagreement and lack of support which lead to fighting. Healthy boundaries and good communication is so needed to live in the same place with others , as well as respecting each others opinions and needs is very much important for a healthy atmosphere in the home.
March 30th, 2020 8:57pm
They argue and fight because it is a safe space to do so. Growing up my parents used to yell and scream at me all of the time. It was scary. If you dont want to yell and fight tell the person you are yelling and fighting with. Talk to them when they are calm. Explain how you feel. It is normal to get angry and upset but you dont deserve trauma from it. Its healthy to express emotions but not at the expense of others. Family can be tricky because you are essentially stuck with them for life. Hopefully you feel safe expressing your feelings.
July 6th, 2020 8:10pm
it may be a way of letting anger out from other situations, some relationships are difficult and most of the times its okay, it gives a better understanding of a person and what their boundaries are but sometimes if this happens repeatedly and may cause physical abuse it's time to contact the authorities or get help from a therapist that is certified to clear the air. everyone fights once in a while and not every relationship is "perfect" and you can't just keep everything bottled up, instead of arguing a conversation is better and it's a calmer way to explain your problems or emotions.