35+ Community Check-in February 22-25, 2021

Hi lovely people in the 35+ community, I hope you had a great weekend 
When we use cognitive filters we see the world and ourselves in a different light.
How much filtering do you use in life? Are you generally looking more for evidence supporting your self-criticism or evidence that you’re a good person? 🤔
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@amiablePeace77
I seek for positivity always!
It's sometimes the little things in life that keep you going, making you feel great! "What you seek you shall find" I have gratitude moments daily and it's just something that helps me. I know my strengths as well as my weaknesses and so I play to those strengths but still happy to recognize areas in which I could develop.
*high fives* great post! 
How much filtering do you use in life? Are you generally looking more for evidence supporting your self-criticism or evidence that you’re a good person? 🤔
To be honest minus my triggers. . . I don't try to filter my life as i feel i am missing something.
I rather have someone tell me exactly how it is then to have me guessing.
@amiablePeace77
I don't know a lot about filtering - something I need to learn about I think.
How much filtering do you use in life? Are you generally looking more for evidence supporting your self-criticism or evidence that you’re a good person? 🤔
This is where I get into self-compassion and work on changing my inner voice that way, and address my self-criticism, or treat myself in a more gentle fashion.
@Skyglider
Good to hear that you're using compassion to soften your inner voice. To me compassion is the antidope for harsh self criticism.
@Skyglider
*high fives* 


I use a lot of positive filtering in order to almost think in the opposite of what my brain might be trying to tell me is bad or impossible or negative. I find if I am overly positive it stops me being overly negative because I know I am an extreme person one way or another I would rather be extremely positive instead of extremely negative. However I guess the goal is to somehow find some happy medium some balance in it all! Still working on that I guess 🤔
@socialite777
woo hooooooo! *high fives* and you are brilliant my friend! 
You are controlling your brain, flipping a switch on your emotions as opposed to them controlling you and just "going along for the ride" in life. 

If you ask me, this is practicing meta cognition (thinking about, what we are thinking about) and making a choice!
Shit-shit-shit!
Noboby wishes to help!
Only to cherish their pride!
Only to pride with what they undeserved have!
@amiablePeace77
I feel like I'm not specifically looking to support my self-criticism, but if I see something that I feel that confirms it, I do take that to heart.
I feel like I am on the verge of a breakdown. I’m already medicated. I’m so lonely. I WANT my husband to cheat on me or leave me so badly because I have nowhere else to go and I don’t want him to kick me out of the house. We have a one year old. She was born in February and my mom died in March. She was my only friend. I am afraid to drive and I’m just trapped here.
@Danielle1001
You sound very overwhelmed right now, hugs. I'm so sorry to hear about your loss, my heart goes out to you. Remember we are always here for you if you want to share
.
It's hard to feel not getting forward anymore, being stuck. I hope coming here will help you to find some peace of mind.
This is a link to our self help guides https://www.7cups.com/supportGuides/selfHelpGuides.php. I hope there is something which will be beneficial to you, like for example the guide getting unstuck.
Hello
@Redvein
Hi there, nice that you are here with us! I hope you will find the support you are looking for on this site, remember you can always connect to a listener if you like to share something more in detail. www.7cups.com/BrowseListeners/.