35+ Community Check in September 35th to October 3rd 2022
Social Anxiety: a fear that does not go away and affects everyday activities, self confidence, relationships and work or school life,
Do you often find yourself changing your likes and dislikes based on the people around you?
The truth is, we people-pleasers often just want to be liked and understood, but we’re so scared of the opposite that we’ll often bend to others’ needs and expectations rather than stand steadfast in our own.
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@pamharley003
Well said!!
We need to start changing our people-pleasing actions and start doing things that make us happy!
Stop focusing on others and start focusing on yourself! <3
Wonderful post!💛💫
@pamharley003 Thank you for posting this topic.
I believe that is true: people pleasers want to be liked and understood. I think I started out a people pleaser, but not so much any more. It can be exhausting, which is where I found myself. :)
I don't have the energy to people-please now even if I wanted to. haha. Years ago, I would have also considered myself an over-achiever, but now I am not. The phrase 'quiet quitting' really resonates with me today. I often feel very burnt out. So, I am less apt to try to please others.
When you used to be a people-pleaser, and you stop, this can really bother some people. I have noticed this in my own life.
I don't have a lot of diverse interests. So, I don't think I change my like/dislikes in conversations to get people to like me. I am also introverted though. So, I don't have much to talk about until I really get to know a person. The most I do (in polite conversation) is say, oh yes, I should try that sometime or that sounds fun! When in reality, I'll probably never try those things. :)
@Olive1Q82
Thank for your explanation on the topic I posted. I have also stopped pleasing others when I first need to p lease myself. It is hard when some people pleasers make everything about themselves not caring about others. I have stayed away from the ( as I call it ) toxic people. When I am in a crowd of friends I stay quiet and those who start to whine about things I try to walk away nicely because I can not be around them.
@pamharley003
I am so lost with this new 7cups layout. How do I find the things that I post now? I just posted something but I don't see it.
@pamharley003 i definitely do this bc i want people to like me
