Finding a therapist
Hello, I am a newbie here. I'm really glad to have found you all. I am closer to 50 than 35, but still over 35. As an older person I find it really difficult to find suitable therapy. I have had some bad experiences. My last therapist would actually just miss sessions all together and later tell me that she had technical issues. I feel like I have very complicated problems and I really can't relate to therapists who do not have kids. Can anyone help me figure out the best way to find a therapist? I like that I could text my therapist using this site, but I feel like it is maybe a little too expensive for me and I don't think I would text that much because like my name says I am more reserved.
If I'mgoing to spend the money and invest the time. Just want to make sure I find the right person who I feel comfortable with and who also can understand my complex situation. What has worked for you and what hasn't worked for you? How do you like therapy if you're using the therapy on this site?
@reservedOwl321
Boosting so you get more views <3
I am so sorry to hear that those experiences happened to you! I have not used this site for therapy, so unfortunately I will not be able to help with that aspect.
As far as finding a therapist, advice from a long distance friend who is also a therapist: look up therapists based on the issues you would like addressed. She recommended Psychology Today or Open Path Collective. I have a multitude of issues: anxiety, depression, childhood medical trauma, and secondary PTSD (not sure if this is a thing, but I heard it maybe is?) so I did some research on what that kind of therapy would look like. I went on *** and saw a reel about a therapist and what to look for when searching for one and all of a sudden my whole page is filled with therapists and different approaches for different types of therapy lol So, I had kind of an idea of what I was looking for beforehand. You don’t have to do this, but I already had two failed attempts with therapists so I was determined to get it right this time.
Back to the point! She said if you find one you might like, reach out and ask if you can do a 15 min free consultation. I asked about 10 therapists on Open Path Collective to do this and not a single one of them said no. In fact, most of them say to reach out for the consultation in their bio. Explain your fears or past experiences and what you’re not looking for, and let them sell themselves to you. It’s your interview to find your fit. When I found my current therapist, I knew within 5 minutes she was what I needed because her response to what I was looking for blew me out of the water as something I never thought once to look into and try to fix.
I hope this helps a little bit and good luck! Feel free to reach out if you have any questions.
I am so sorry to hear that those experiences happened to you! I have not used this site for therapy, so unfortunately I will not be able to help with that aspect.
As far as finding a therapist, advice from a long distance friend who is also a therapist: look up therapists based on the issues you would like addressed. She recommended Psychology Today or Open Path Collective. I have a multitude of issues: anxiety, depression, childhood medical trauma, and secondary PTSD (not sure if this is a thing, but I heard it maybe is?) so I did some research on what that kind of therapy would look like. I went on *** and saw a reel about a therapist and what to look for when searching for one and all of a sudden my whole page is filled with therapists and different approaches for different types of therapy lol So, I had kind of an idea of what I was looking for beforehand. You don’t have to do this, but I already had two failed attempts with therapists so I was determined to get it right this time.
Back to the point! She said if you find one you might like, reach out and ask if you can do a 15 min free consultation. I asked about 10 therapists on Open Path Collective to do this and not a single one of them said no. In fact, most of them say to reach out for the consultation in their bio. Explain your fears or past experiences and what you’re not looking for, and let them sell themselves to you. It’s your interview to find your fit. When I found my current therapist, I knew within 5 minutes she was what I needed because her response to what I was looking for blew me out of the water as something I never thought once to look into and try to fix.
I hope this helps a little bit and good luck! Feel free to reach out if you have any questions.
Thank you for your response zedspike. That is comforting to know that when you asked for a free consultation they were all ok with it. If I didn't have to worry about insurance, I'm sure it would be a lot easier, but if I can find providers that will do a consultation, I could work within the insurance and still get a better picture. I will try this.
I second PsychologyToday and Open Path! I found my therapist on PsychologyToday before and I still use it. But there might be sites like ZocDoc, Headway, that you can look up therapists on.
I just saw this @peacefulRose. I have never heard of those zocdoc, I appreciate you sharing!
@reservedOwl321 boosting :)
Thanks for helping to boost the thread @njuv12 . I haven't had the chance to search for me, because I have been busy coordinating care for my daughter and working and running errands! I really appreciate all of the help so far, and am so glad I found this site!
I have been through a couple therapists myself and I personally struggled most with finding someone I could be fully honest with.
If you’re in the US, I’d recommend either happier living or hello Alma to find a new therapist. You can also see who takes your insurance and filter by specific issues.
@potatoesandproblems It is a struggle for me too to be completely honest and to trust sometimes. It makes it harder when you have to do telehealth IMO.
Thank you so much for the resources! I was able find 5 options on HelloAlma and schedlued 2 consultations already. HappierLiving looked good, but I wasn't able to pick a provider or find my insurance. I would like to keep searching for therapists, but this is a good start I think.
Thank you everyone for the encouragement. I had my first consultation already and have another one today. I seem to be having more luck with hello Alma than the others for different reasons. Unfortunately on psychology today most of the practitioners do not contact me back. I guess I need to try to call rather than email though that can be difficult with my work schedule. I did have one practitioner tell me that she didn't think we would be a good fit which is discouraging, but she did give me a referral. This process! This is harder than I had expected it to be, but I expect it will be worth it.
Thank you everyone for the encouragement. I had my first consultation already and have another one today. I seem to be having more luck with hello Alma than the others for different reasons. Unfortunately on psychology today most of the practitioners do not contact me back. I guess I need to try to call rather than email though that can be difficult with my work schedule. I did have one practitioner tell me that she didn't think we would be a good fit which is discouraging, but she did give me a referral. This process! This is harder than I had expected it to be, but I expect it will be worth it.
I am struggling with this too! It feels like there is so much to unpack that a one hour session just isnt enough to even break the surface.
I found someone on psychology today but she has been beating around the bush with scheduling and now I just feel like a hassle so I’ve been reluctant to tell her for the 3rd time I want to schedule an appointment.
You’re not alone and it is scary and sad how hard this process can be. Hang in there Owl!
I'm sorry you're dealing with us too. It looks like we posted at exactly the same time. Maybe you should try hello Alma instead. It is easier I think to schedule a consultation on there.
@reservedOwl321 Oops I meant this not us. I was using my phone, sorry :)