The Challenge of Loss After 50 - A Challenge Series
Hi everyone this will be a new series in the Challenges We Face section of sub forum 50+. The intent of this new series is to get those who are going through similar can post and share great tips that helped them through this particular challenge. Feel free to respond to each other here as well.
Please comment your feedback on this style of this series and what you like about it. If there are other topics you would like to see in this challenge series? There is power in people going through the same thing and a sense of community.
One of the biggest challenges is loss. Coping with the loss of someone or something you love is one of life’s biggest challenges. You may associate grieving with the death of a loved one—which is often the cause of the most intense type of grief—but any loss can cause grief, including:
- Divorce or Break Up
- Loss of Health
- Loss of a Job
- Loss of Financial Stability
- Retirement
- Loss of a Pet
- Loss of a Cherished Dream
- Loss of a Friendship
- Loss of Safety After Trauma
-
Selling the Family Home
If someone is currently going through a loss, what are your three tips that helped you cope through a the loss of a loved one? Reminder to keep this post positive.
@SunShineAlwaysGrateful
UPDATED TAGLIST 5/30/2023
1st part
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@SunShineAlwaysGrateful
2nd Part Taglist
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@SunShineAlwaysGrateful
Hi, Grateful,
If someone is currently going through a loss, what are your three tips that helped you cope through a the loss of a loved one?
I have cut off my last sister/the last member of my blood family that I was working for last year. I'm honestly not coping very well with it, but I know it's for the best.
@purpleTree4652
Sooo sorry to hear that. It is extremely difficult when your family of origin have difficulty.
If the relationship is needing some space for self care that is a good thing for what you need right now.'
My dad and I had a difficult relationship. It was tough to deal with or mostly I avoided him for my own peace of mind. When he passed away, I live with regret that I did not try more.
I hope you can eventually get to a place to be in each others lives in a way that works for you both. Sometimes simple connection even a text check in will keep you connected with my dad he was techie so I we could not do that. My aunt has a daughter and I suggested that for them and it is working bc it is no drama just check in and both can manage that kinda of connection with ease.💬💬
Sending you both positive healing vibes to you both. ❤️
@SunShineAlwaysGrateful
Hi, Grateful,
No. In some cases it is healthy and important to cut off toxic family members. That is the case with me.
Thank you for attempting to offer helpful ideas.
--tree
I have no tips, I've never known how to deal with the loss of a loved one.
@WharfRat
So sorry to hear that. Here are some tips in dealing with loss. I think in any loss you need to keep doing what you need to do in life. But do take time to grief. It is a journey adjustment to loss. It will always impact you how you life your life and reminders of that loss. Lean on routine.
Thank you for sharing. Please know you are not alone. I lost my dad and I have struggled with the loss. I found a song that helps.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=b0kJYTz1kuo
I will post it here for you. Please know we are here for you.
- Take care of yourself. Try to exercise regularly, eat healthy food, and get enough sleep.
- Talk with caring friends.
- Try not to make any major changes right away.
- Join a grief support group in person or online.
- Consider professional support.
-
Be patient with yourself.
I know it is inevitable. Without loss how are to feel and know the wonders.
From time to time I think of the time of when it will happen. It has to happen. It is known. We do not know when.
My spouse ihas reached age of when it is common.
Enough on that ;)
The struggle to me in the direction of my spouse..
It will sound strange, but.i know I will not be judged
I hope I will be "normal"
From a person whom has never felt "normal" this is a time I wish to not be a waste or become a basket case. But I hope to be or show "normal" feelings.... well to feel!
Sounds weird I know
You are absolutely correct ✅ no one knows the time we have remaining on this earth. That is why the present is such a gift 🎁.
You are not alone in how you feel.
Make sure you are prepared for the things that need sorting will certainly make it smoother. The documents you need completed so it will help with that direction when needed.
I myself and my hub much the same and health has been an issue here as well and we still need to sort some things and I know it is challenging to do but needed. For me it will be somewhat less stressful.
Enjoy every day, every celebration, and be present.
Your feeling are valid and relatable ….
i am sending out positive vibes to you both this weekend have some fun and share some laughs. 💕
Still having urine leakage.
So sorry! Have you seen the dr to assess your situation? It is very normal for women in mid life. There are a wide variety of products to help on the market.
Have a good weekend. 💕
Losing someone is tough in general, old age and natural causes being normal , yet it doesn't make it any easier. The ones that hurt the most though are the ones that go to soon..... In my lifetime, I've had 2 friends take their own life, lost a parent in an auto accident, and a spouse to cancer, both in their 40s. What bothers me the most about all that is they were good people....the whole why do bad things happen to good people thing.....how do I cope and deal with it....I do the worst thing possible and shove my feelings inside the deepest darkest place in my brain....and move on with life....not healthy I know, but I really don't have the coping mechanism to deal with it
@SunShineAlwaysGrateful I lost a beloved cat not long ago and it was the most intense pain I've ever known. I feel I am finally able to move forward. I have a little dog who is aging and I dread losing her and going through all that pain again. They are family members.
@gbrenna
I have been through the loss of several pets. The last one was heartbreaking because my cat and I were so close. That sounds kind of funny, but what I mean is, we were ALWAYS together. He was on my lap or at my side or at my feet 99% of the day, every day, for years.
I vowed I'd never have another pet because it was just too painful to go through. And then a few months go by and I look at the animal shelters....and I adopt some new family members. And I will go through the pain of losing them, too. But, at least I know I was able to rescue them and provide them a loving home with lots of treats, love and care for the remaining years, rather than have them stuck in a shelter.
@SunShineAlwaysGrateful loss of a parent.
I had the good fortune to call mom every day for 4+ uears before she died. Just having that much time on the phone with her was a gift.
It is difficult to contemplate a world without mom. She has always been there. I need to keep working on reinventing my life.
I am imagining what it was like to be a helpless infant and mom nurtured me so I grew up to be an adult. No matter what happened that was not nice, this is a gift I just do not know how to repay except with a sincere sense of gratitude.
