50+ Check-In April 11-14, 2022
Hello everyone 😊, I hope you had a nice day so far and wish you a good week.
Acts of kindness can make the world a happier place. Whether we receive kindness or give kindness, it can boost our confidence, our happiness and our well-being in general.
When we receive an honest compliment from someone and happily accept it, it shows that we accept being worthy of kindness, a notion that some of us struggle with.
1. Do you find it easy to accept honest compliments?
2. What was a moment when a person’s kindness made a difference in your life?
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@amiablePeace77
1. Do you find it easy to accept honest compliments? Yes, I do.
2. What was a moment when a person’s kindness made a difference in your life? When my girlfriend smiled at me when first we met.
@Offmytrack
Awww, it must have been a "magic" moment when you both me! 😊
@amiablePeace77
I think the issue is knowing whether or not they are honest compliments. I can accept them, though.
As far as a person's kindness making a difference in my life...I had to think about this, mostly because I normally never ask anyone for anything and appear so strong that no one really is helpful or kind to me. But there was this one time, when I was young, like 21, and had been staying in this group home waiting to have my baby, since I was having issues with the pregnancy. One of the workers there made me a care package for the baby and gave me $100...which was a whole lot of money to me. It really changed things for me.
@LovelyPlace4774
Wow! I can see that it was a big relief for you having a care package and some money for the baby.
When people believe someone is really strong they hesitate to offer help so I find sometimes it's good to reach out and ask someone for help to make them feel you're just human like them.
@amiablePeace77
Hi, Peace,
1. Do you find it easy to accept honest compliments?
I don't know about easy, but I accept them.
2. What was a moment when a person’s kindness made a difference in your life?
I don't know.
@purpleTree4652
Good that you accept compliments!
I remember the time when I joined 7cups, it's now a bit more than 5 years ago, that was a time when people's kindness here made a change in my life.
1. I do not find it easy to accept compliments. I always think that I'm not whatever the compliment is, if that makes sense...
2. My basement flooded during a hurricane once and everyone I knew came together to help fix it back to normal...
@CyclingThroughLife
When I used not to value but doubt myself I found it hard to accept compliments. Lot of self love practices helped me to accept them much easier.
Wow, that must have felt so good having everybody around to help!
@amiablePeace77
Looking back at the time my basement flooded(talking 5 feet of water), I am NOW happy for all the help....at the time though, I felt like it was my problem, and I had to handle it myself....I still am that way, in the moment, when it comes to asking or needing help with ANYTHING....You would think after 50 years on this planet I would learn I can't go it alone, but I still think I can, and try......I know its a fault of mine, along with many others that I know need work....(being a loner is another one...but that's another post for another forum....Anyone else happier when they are all alone?)
@CyclingThroughLife
I would like to share this quote with you which I take as a reminder "No man is an island, entire of itself; every man is a piece of the continent, a part of the main" and add "We can learn to ask for help no matter how old we are". Hope coming here will help you.
I am very uncomfortable receiving any compliment at all. I am comfortable giving compliments.
All kindness, any help, any caring-- that is genuine, I so appreciate it, am thankful for it all so much.
@IcedCoffee211109
Giving compliments to people we find that they did a nice thing can be much easier than appreciating all the good things we do or have. Learning to say just "Thank you" instead of declining it or even saying "not true" needs practise in my opinion but with time it can work and even feel good.
@amiabkePeace77
I agree ami, that replying to someone who gave you a compliment, by saying, "Thank you," is a good thing to do. It validates what they have expressed to you, and helps the whole situation be a good and positive, without creating problems. I do this, myself, as much as possible in life.
Granted, it is very difficult on me inside, I know and understand how helpful this is overall.
Yes I agree, that I still need to practice doing better. I have a lot of things I need to do better, in life. I make tons of mistakes, as well. But, I do my best to realize when I am doing wrong, am able to realize so much that I do need to improve with. I am grateful that I can realize these things, so I can work on i.proving so much. I am very grateful for friends in life that will honestly tell me when they feel I have not done something right, have said things in a wrong way, and much more. I try to think about what they have said, on my own, realize a lot about it, and I do my best to then thank the friends, each time for what they have said, concerning things I need to change, improve, work on, etc.
I also try to recognize faults I have that need improvements on my own, as well. I need to do a lot of things better, in many ways in life. I am also grateful for a while lot in life, also. I could probably write too much here, that I am grateful for, thankful for, and appreciate so much.
I still know I need to constantly work on many things, which I so need to do much better with.
Thank you, Ami, for you. I appreciate you, Ami.
I am glad that you've been enjoying working with your garden a lot this year, and have harvested food you planted, and took care of in your garden. That's a great feeling. I am happy you are really getting a lot out of your gardening, in many ways. Take care, Ami.
@IcedCoffee211109
I'm glad that you have friends who support you and obviously want to help you to grow! Having people in life whom you can trust and you also want to listen too is very helpful.
You've mentioned a lot about improving things, making mistakes - have you considered to make a list about all the things you did right, just to put things in balance and not only highlighting what went wrong?
1. Do you find it easy to accept honest compliments?
No. I don't feel like I deserve them.
2. What was a moment when a person’s kindness made a difference in your life?
A guy my mom knows put in a new post for my mailbox. Another guy just replaced parts of my gutters.
@WharfRat
I hope this will change one day for you and will see your own worth. ❤️ People who give honest compliments want to make you feel good and it also makes them feel good to accept them.
Nice that you got that help with the mailbox and gutter!
@amiablePeace77
1. Do you find it easy to accept honest compliments? Yes, I do.
2. What was a moment when a person’s kindness made a difference in your life? When my girlfriend says she wants to cuddle with me.
@Offmytrack
Awww, that's so sweet. I can imagine your heart was jumping for joy 😊
Nice to hear that you can accept compliments!
I had compliments for the shop window I did at the Break charity Shop, it was nice as I was very nervous about doing it as I’m just a volunteer.
I just said thanks and accepted it rather than made a fuss x
@Susiefloos
Wow, decorating a shop window needs a lot of creativity. Did you learn it or are you self taught?
Just a thank you sounds nice.
@amiablePeace77
1. Yes I generally am good with accepting compliments when they happen with a smile and a thank you.
2. The biggest act of kindness was a friend/colleague I made in a new job at the time offered to be my guarantor when I needed to have someone earning over a certain limit to be allowed to private rent a studio flat. That enabled me to finally move on from a damaging marriage and find my fresh start. That fresh start eventually lead to us falling in love and then getting married 3 and a half years ago.
@Mandi72
What a beautiful ending of a rough time you had before! I wish you both all the best.
@amiablePeace77
1. Do you find it easy to accept honest compliments? I used to argue until I realized that by giving me compliments that person is also benefiting themselves. Now whatever people see in me I know they have that within themselves too.
2. What was a moment when a person’s kindness made a difference in your life? When I was confused someone helped me get through that. It is not easy but having a friend or a mentor helps.
@soulsings
I can relate because I did the same, putting compliments down not understanding that we make others uncomfortable with it. Nice that you had that support when you needed it, friends and mentors are precious people in our lives.