50+ community Weekend Check-in January 3-5, 2020
Happy New Year beautfiul people in the 50+ community 
Can you think of a time when you were scared or angry? What did you do to help yourself feel better?
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@amiablePeace77 I have to deal with frustration that can lead to anger if I do not get an objective view of it. I have to ask myself if this situation is a matter of survival. If not, I try to not get frustrated.
EX something falls on the floor. Rather than scold myself, I ask "Okay something is on the floor I have to clean up. How do I do that?"
No need to get angry.
@soulsings
I like that soul, not focussing on what has happened but how do I proceed from here. (Hope though you will have very little frustration in 2020)
@soulsings wow Soul I love your approach - thinking like that seems so helpful!
@SoulfullyAButterfly thank you!
There was a time last August and September when I was afraid that my girlfriend was going to leave me. I took extra care of her, drove her places that I thought (correctly) she wanted to see. It eventually worked.
@Offmytrack I am glad that the action you took when you were a bit afraid worked out for you.
@Offmytrack
That was a nice thing to do, seems also you know what she likes and that means you understand her. 
I can only imagine how worrisome the thought of losing her must have been for you though.
@amiablePeace77 You are correct on all counts. I was very afraid I would lose her, I was very glad I didn't. Now we are in discussions of living together (again).
@Offmytrack
Awesome Offmytrack, wish you both a great future!
I screamed into my pillow. Then got out my dammit doll and banged it on the wall a few times took a breath and moved on. Still not over it but, getting to the point it wont bother me anymore.
@Lauren63- wow I like the idea of a dammit doll- never heard of one- tell me more
@barncat Whenever things dont go so well, And you want to hit the wall and yell, heressa little Dammit Doll, That you cant do without just Grasp it firmly by the legs, And find a place tho slam it, and as you whack the stuffing out of it yell dammit, dammit dammit. That is what its for. Look online there are many. You dont hurt anything that way when you are raging.
@Lauren63
I find that's a great way to release anger, glad these dolls exist. Thanks for sharing the information about it too.
Hope you feel better now about what happened.
@amiablePeace77 you dont know what happened. I felt better but the situation has not changed. The person involved doesnt understand me. They dont get me.
Mentally and physically preparing to get back into the Work-for-pay saddle now that winter holidays are coming to a close.
Mentally preparing to relocate at the end of next month. Still haven't locked in where I'll be going.
Have moved away from "freaking out about so much isolation/solitude" to enjoying it and finding benefits to it
Finally, bit by bit, am getting projects prioritised and broken down into do-able, reportable, chunks (milestones).
@azureBalloon6704 that is great, I benefit a lot through mental imaging and preparation beforehand too.
@azureBalloon6704
These are great news, I am glad you find benefits in your isolation/solitutde too. Sounds like the new year started well, wish you all the best for it.
Thank you so much for your acknowledgment, @amiablePeace77 . Did your first week of 2020 go well also?
@azureBalloon6704
so far a great ending and great new beginning of the years, thanks for asking
This morning I was very angry because I didn't find my puding. I cried because my legs hurt me when I was searching for it in the fridge, so I called my mom during her work and yelled at her, then when my dad heared me screaming he looked for it and found it easily for me. I was silly and wiered, no?!!
@DinaElwy
I find anger creates a tunnel vision and one does not see what you are looking for, even if it is right in front of you. Often it helps to just step away for a moment and go back..
Something I find helpful too is the stop technique
s = stop t = take a breath o = observe = p proceed mindfully
@amiablePeace77 that's so hepful, thanks.
@DinaElwy
You are very welcome 
How are you feeling?yucky sad lonely frustrated
2. Are you upset about anything or is there anything bothering you?YES argument with a neighbor early this AM
Then realized my ex is really in a serious relationship and she has kids, I knew he was a cheater which is why we broke up but this is more serious then he and I were which makes me angry Why couldnt I be that person
3. Name one positive thing about yourself!I am cute? Friendly funny but I feel it doesnt matter because I cant meet anyone compatible! So frustrating
@Dancersoul
Hope the situation with your neighbour cooled down and things are alright again.
Seeing your ex in a new relationship is often devastating, especially if the new relationship represents all you wanted (like kids). It is not uncommon to have those feelings even if he was a cheater, hugs. The right person for you might be out there and already looking for you.
Do you have a hobby or something youre passionate about to do to direct your thoughts to something else and make you feel better?
@Dancersoul
How are you doing today?
