I don’t know how to describe my anxiety.
I’ve been trying to figure this out for YEARS now. My anxiety acts up everytime i have to eat out, either—for example—at my sister’s house or at a restaurant. It starts off as usual, i have basic symptoms of anxiety like stomach ache and i feel like there’s a lump stuck right in my throat, sometimes i even feel nauseous. Then it downright spirals to every sound drowning out around me. It’s just me, my anxiety, and the ache that’s causing me—both mentally and physically.
I am just a teenager. I am 15, the peak of adolescence, i guess, and i can’t seem to enjoy my life because of my anxiety. In August, I’m going on vacation and everything I get this prickling anxiety that makes me feel worse even if the day isn’t here yet. I’m afraid I won’t be able to enjoy this because I’m sick.
I signed up to this app because my parents refuse to get me professional help, saying that only crazy people go to therapy. I wish and I hope that I’ll find someone here to talk to, since I’m quite shy and I don’t have the courage to contact a listener just yet.
Any tip is greatly appreciated! And remember, whatever you’re going through, you’re strong! <3
@urba4soffz hi I'm Lola 💖 welcome to 7 cups 💗 anxiety is such a horrible thing to have, especially at such a young age🙁 with the anxiety around eating at your sister's or restaurant, is it because your not comfortable with people seeing you eat?? It's ok to be scared about your vacation and stuff, sometimes the worrying/anxiety beforehand is the worst part🙁 try breathing exercises to help you feel more grounded💖💖 gives you a giant tiny hug 💗 right here for you 💗
Hi Lola! Thank you for the kind words🩷
I figured a while ago that the problem wasn’t eating in front of people—it has never been, but honestly i wish it was that easy to find out the reason behind my anxiety everytime i eat out.
It isn’t a problem with food per-se aswell, because at home I eat normally—and honestly, i think i even struggle with some binging but i haven’t gotten that checked on yet so i’m just gonna keep it a question mark, for now.
I don’t know, I think just sitting at a table in a restaurant gives me anxiety, but there’s not really a reason why—atleast, no reason i can think of. I hope I can figure this out someday and be able to enjoy my teenage years, but I don’t know how to do that if my family denies me to get professional help.
I’ve been trying to find some therapists online for free, but no luck. I hope I’ll solve it soon, it’s worsening my mental health in general and giving me bad thoughts about life.
Thank you for spending a few minutes listening to me🫶🏻🩷
@urba4soffz unfortunately anxiety doesn't always need a reason🙁 it's like a monster that pops up whenever he feels like it🙁 it must be incredibly difficult for you being so young and not allowed to see a therapist, bless you. I'm guessing there's no school therapist you can see? I'm sorry sweetie I really hope this site helps you to get through this 💖 hugs you tightly 💖
Thank you for the kind words again🩷
I do have a school therapist I can reach out to, but that’s available only for the school year and we’re on summer break now, in my country school starts in September so i need to get through August, which is the hardest moment for me because we go on vacation.
Unfortunately I heard that the procedure to talk to the school therapist is a bit difficult, atleast in my school, but I’ll try.
Thank you for the tips and support!🥹🩷
@urba4soffz
Thats definitely not true that only crazy people go to therapy.
People go:
For advice.
Support.
To be understood.
To be heard.
To gain educated insights.
For a fresh and professional perspective.
It's a strength to seek help.
We all need help, doesn't diminish our worth or our ability to live a full and healthy, adjusted life.
Our feelings don't determine our worth or our reliability or capabilities.
You deserve to be heard, understood and supported and loved to move forward 💜💕
@urba4soffz
Have you ever seen your doctor? (Do you trust your doctor?)
no☹️ i have already talked to my mom about my anxiety, but she gave only some tips. i really think i need some professional help—that’s why i’m trying to find a way to have a therapist for free.
My mom just think that therapy is for crazy people, just excusing my feelings with: “Everyone has anxiety” but i know that mine is draining my life.
I could call my family doctor by myself, I know, but I’m constantly being checked on by my family and I don’t think i can keep it a secret for long.
@urba4soffz
Hi … (in case you missed it, @Tinywhisper11 asked if there is a school therapist who can help?)
I’m not sure if an online therapist (even if they could treat you for free) would be able to do it without parental consent.
I was thinking your doctor could help you find a therapist. But I see what you mean regarding how your family will eventually find out. It may be your best option though, no matter how scared you are … it isn’t worth your mental health.
Please keep sharing, here at 7Cups, as you make your decision. Maybe another idea will surface.
Feel free to reach out again, or let us know how your progress is going.
Hi! Thank you for taking some time to talk🩷
For the school therapist, I think that’s only available during the school year and here, in my country, we start in September. August is the worst month for me (vacation and all) so I’m going to try and get through it!
I heard that in my school the process of reaching out to the school therapist is a bit difficult, but I’ll try once the school year starts!—even though we don’t have the best school system so i doubt that i could get some help, but it’s worth a shot!
Thank you for the tips🩷
@urba4soffz
Hi!
When is your family vacation?
Is the whole family excited? How are you feeling about it? Where are you going?
Hi! Sorry for the late reply, didn’t get the notification🥹🩷
I’m going on vacation on Monday night if I’m correct, I’ll just get in the car with my family and travel to Croatia, stay there for 3/4 days and then travel back to my country to visit my hometown!
The whole family is excited, yes, but I’m a lil bit anxious…I hope it’ll get better, I don’t want to ruin the vacation.
@urba4soffz
No problem about the delayed reply!
I can see you have been working very hard to keep your anxiety from taking over.
You sound really good! I’m glad your whole family is excited for the trip. And I can understand your concern about the effects of your anxiety. Please go easy on yourself: you only started your 7Cups journey less than a month ago.
Try to keep your focus on the things you have to get done in the moment. Take things one step at a time: put one foot in front of the other, and keep going.
If we allow our minds to wander, it could get us into trouble. If you feel blocked or have difficulty in making decisions, then we can talk further about these situations.
Do you or your family practice a religion? Prayer can also be an idea to try; although I would recommend a discussion beforehand, since not all prayers are alike. (This can work for atheists as well, if that is your belief.)
Finally, another strategy you can use is exactly what you did with petalsofhope27 (on July 21 at the bottom of this thread): you tried to share your experience of anxiety, in a helpful way, with someone who was looking for help. (You did a great job!)
You are very compassionate and smart—it doesn’t matter that you are only 15. You have gifts to share with others here on 7Cups. And one of those gifts is in short supply: hope.
@urba4soffz
My anxiety comes on at different times. Sometimes I don’t know when to expect it and sometimes I do. I started right around your age. It felt like I was dying. That’s the only way I could describe it. I would leave class bawling my eyes out.
To this day, I still try to figure Who, what, where and why it’s happening or causing it. I’ve learned that those thought processes only increase the symptoms. It’s a negative thought wheel that Keeps spinning looking for validation.
I try not to define myself “I am anxious” more so, “I’m feeling anxious” put my anxiety in its own little box where it belongs. I am not anxiety. I am me.
Breathing. I know everyone says that and it can be annoying. But our body increases our heart rate when we are anxious, then it increases breathing, which increases heart rate and keeps going. That is what brings on being lightheaded 😩 if you can slow down breathing it will help slow everything down. Also, there is a growth path on 7 cups that has been a wonderful tool for me!!!! Lots of suggestions there. I hope you find comfort and are able to reach out to a listener some day.
you’re strong too 💖💖💖
Hi!! Thank you for the kind words🥹🩷
I have tried breathing techniques sometimes, though not recently, never passed my mind honestly😭🫶🏻 I’ll try to find the right breathing pattern for me and use it when I’m feeling anxious!
Thank you for the tips🩷 You’re strong aswell!🫶🏻
Hi, that sounds really tough.
I've also had random times in my life where suddenly every time I go to restaurants or it's 'social eating' of some sort I feel scared I'll feel sick, then I suddenly do, but if I tell the people I'm with that sometimes I feel sick from nerves, it goes away again.
It's come and gone my whole life and still pops up when it's a social situation and I suddenly remember and worry...but the kinder I am to myself and remind myself it's not the end of the world that sometimes helps. I just wanted to message that you aren't crazy or alone in these worries, i hope you can find your own little ways to make it feel better.
All the best,
Tao
Hi Tao!🥹 Thank you for the kind words, I’m happy I found people that understood me this time! I’m currently trying to work on it with some breathing techniques and sometimes “talking” to myself and trying to convince myself that this is okay and I’m not actually going to collapse from anxiety, but it’s hard.
Thank you for your support🩷 I’ll try and get better! We’re strong🥹🫶🏻
My anxiety comes out of nowhere
Aw! I’m so sorry honey🩷 We’re together in this, I wish that we could both get put of this but it’s a hard path.
I can share with you some tips I’m learning with time! Try breathing techniques—as annoying as it sounds, it helps! A comment under my thread said that controlling your breathing helps your heartrate to slow down and not feel your heart almost beating out of your chest!
Also, remind yourself that anxiety is not the end of the world! You might feel like collapsing at that moment, but it’s temporary! In a way or another, it will stop!
If you can, try to get in contact with a therapist if you’d like, they definitely have better advice than me, a teenager, could give! haha
Hope you will manage to find peace! Remember: there has to be some light at the end of the tunnel, no matter how long it is!
Wish you all the best, you’re strong!🩷🫶🏻
