I Am Not Okay Today
I pushed myself to be happy through the holidays. But my mind is just tired and frustrated now, and I'm not feeling okay today. Am I anxious? Definitely. Am I feeling depressed today? Yeah, I think so.
Everyone I know is feeling it, so I don't want to sit here feeling sorry for myself. My family members everywhere are on edge. They're bickering with each other. They're sad. They're frustrated. And I am, too.
I'm missing the joy of this time of year. I'm tired of this covid crap. Did anyone think we would be here like this ten months later? No.
A few months ago I could always see the "when this is all over" scenario. But now I'm just feeling that every day is the same and there isn't any change to it. And it's just going to continue looking the same.
Maybe I just need to take a road trip somewhere, just to get out of the house.
I know things will get better. I'm generally a pretty positive person, so when I'm not, it hits me hard.
Sorry. Just needed to vent this stress and panicky feeling somewhere and this is just a safe place to do it.
@thoughtfulmomma
Hear you loud amd clear.
@thoughtfulmomma I hear what your saying. Wondering when life will get back to normal. In the meantime I'm glad we can talk to each othef. It helps knowing other people have the same feelings!
@thoughtfulmomma
I agree with@ShikiBabyBat and with @InquireWithin
Thanks, Everyone. It's just all hitting me hard right now. I haven't felt like this since early summer. I'm just so burned out. I feel like I've been trying to be strong and positive so that everyone else will feel better and I just can't do it any more.
This all sucks. Plain and simple. And we're all together in this suck, and yet we all feel so alone.
@thoughtfulmomma
" And we're all together in this suck, and yet we all feel so alone." This, for me, is what's so maddening about it! trapped forward backward, coming and going. gah :(
@InquireWithin
YES. Freedom, then lock down, then tighter lock down, then little freedom, then lock down.... It's like we should all go to bed and then just start back up when Spring rolls around.
@thoughtfulmomma I can definitely relate where u say that we're together in this but feel alone. And I do have people to support me but it still feels lonely because of stigma and I don't wanna worry people. Again if you need someone to talk to I'm open for that, although idk how to just start DMs with people on here, I'm honestly just now getting into this app. I had it for a while just haven't used it much.
@ShikiBabyBat
It's good that you've got support. I do, too, but with everyone feeling bad, it's hard to get support from those people.
That's why I come here. Just to write and get it out there. Posting here does help, even a little bit.
@thoughtfulmomma
Yeah that makes sense, just about everyone feels bad rn so I'm guessing that's why it's so easy to feel like u have no support? And I'm glad to hear posting here helps u out even if it's just a little. Just curious do u have a listener on here? I got myself set up with one even tho I wasn't particularly doing bad yesterday cuz I thought it'd be good to have one. Also thinking of signing up as a listener myself.
@ShikiBabyBat
I found a good listener in the past but haven't chatted in a while.
@thoughtfulmomma- you have truly touched the subject on many of our minds. I recall making a countdown calendar in March, anticipating the lockdown would be over in May!!! Now hopefully most of us will have access to the vaccine by May 2021. thank you for opening the discussion for us. I really does help to hear others stories.
@barncat
It absolutely feels better to connect with everyone here who's feeling the same way. I know it's not fun, but I'm so glad we have each other, even in this text-based world right here.
@thoughtfulmomma Feeling the exact same way.
Last day before returning to work and all I can do is hide under the covers in bed.
