Social Anxiety can be harder than most people think - Getting help.
Hey guys :D I was doing some thinking and after seeing just how many people on here have some form of social anxiety it'd be nice to discuss something.
What is the hardest things about seeking out help for your social anxiety?
What I think when I ponder this question is the fact that although there will be so many places you can go to for help, and different things that can be done; there usually always is one big problem - most of it puts you in a social situation to do so. Think about it, if you have problems with being scared of spiders you wouldn't go ask a spider for help, you'd be too scared to try that, so why is it for most help with social anxiety we have to go and talk to people about it? D: It seems to be a big dilemma as you have to go through a lot of hardship and face your social anxiety and take it head on to be able to even try to get help most of the time, this just makes it way too hard to get help most of the time in my opinion, I'd be glad to hear everyone else's opinion on this :D
I feel like people say soothing things, and those are nice don't get me wron, but they expect your anxiety to go POOF! And it doesn't. There are good days and bad days, and even if I have a good day, that doesn't mean I'm cured.
exactly ! @philosophicalFan9173
@philosophicalFan9173 exactly, but at least they tried eh? :p it's better than nothing xP I think we just need to educate those people somehow, I might even make a full thread on it sometime so you can just give people that link and it's easy and done :p <3
people tries to sympathize you but what they're trying to feel is not even par to what we feel. they will tell things they know instead what we needed. and sometimes? the ones who's most eager to listen will leak your secrets everywhere even though discreetly. these people exists.
@chronosworth ahh that's because they are sympathising when what you are seeking there is empathy not sympathy :p we'd love for people to understand but without proper education they never will as they never really feel it, hopefully one day everyone can understand :D <3 And with people who spread your secrets, maybe you shouldn't trust them anymore? you can probably find other people a lot better to talk to :p <3
In my view, the most difficult thing about social anxiety is that people simply don't know what we feel. It's treated like something that doesn't exist and something that you can change from one day to the other, which is absolutely not the case at all...
@kst96000 yup I definitely need to make a thread on this now I habe seen so many people make this point I just have to go for it now xP I've seen this point be made so much and it's just such a bit problem of miseducation. People not knowing how it works or what it is, it's not just being shy or nervous, it's so much more. <3
The hardest thing for me in seeking help is that because I'm Christian, my friends who are also Christians and even family tell me to pray. But they don't understand that's it's hard and that I really need help and I just need them to listen and empathize. People just quickly come to the conclusion that it's stress and therefore nothing serious. Nobody takes it seriously.
@Tayeidaho oh so it makes praying hard oh no D: maybe you just need to educate them and try to get them to understand because no one can know how you feel till you tell them :o hope this would help ya out a little hehe :p wish ya the best of luck <3
@KeananWillListen thanks :) I'll try. I'll start by talking to people here. Hopefully after that I'll gain the ability to talk to them. It's hard being vulnerable.
@Tayeidaho yeah that can be really hard D: Hope it works out for you ^-^ <3
Not sure if anyone is in the same situation as me here, but i have known I have social anxiety for about a year and a half now. But no one in my real life knows I do. How exactly do i tell them? Just one normal day explain that I have been keeping a crippling mental illness secret from them? Not that I tried to, but I am just lost in how to tell people... it's just so unheard of- and I've just been assumed shy my whole life.
@gemini2405 I had that for so long and only really recently I've been able to tell people, it took me ummm 5 years since I first started trying to actually be able to make myself 'comfortable enough' :p still got a long way to be able to do things as I desire xD but it's really hard to do :/ and when people don't knwo they can make fun of you and make you feel worse which isn't nice D: I can't tell you how to tell because you are yourself and should know best your situation, but you should make sure you're 100% comfortable and if need be it's in private so you have no fears of anything extra happening :D <3
I can't get help because I'm too scared to ask for it.
@IllusoryCorrelations aww *huggles* yeah it sucks doesn't it but that is th whole point of me bringing this up ^-^ it's so much harder when you factor in the fear of the method of getting help too D:
Although I still have some bouts of social anxiety, I have gotten a lot better at having good conversations with people and not feeling as awkward. So I though I'd share some insight. The person who actually helped most with getting through social anxiety though was myself. Once I realized that communicating with people is something that I eventually WILL need in life in order to do anything (especially when it comes to school and job related things), I had to kind of force myself to talk more even though I hated it. I had to make myself comfortable. I had to be the one to step out first. I tried getting help from others in how to do this, but the truth I found out is that nobody is going to be able to be there whenever I'm feeling anxious about talking. I've also learned that it is completely normal to be uncertain about how others will react to you, because chances are the OTHER person is probably thinking the same thing. I also have come to learn that many people are often forgiving over our social blunders. Because I mean how often do you think they've made similar mistakes?
Anyway just wanted to throw that out there for anyone. ^^ Take it (or not) as you will~
@mimameid hehe good words :p and well done on getting better :D I pretty much did the same thing, and last year I had to do a whole drama performance which took so much out of me to do >.< but when you force yourself to to stuff and get your mindset right things can be easier :D just remember not for everyone and not all the time though :p
It's knowing that I have to get out of my comfort zone and get into situations that make me anxious once I seek help, because it's the biggest way to overcome social anxiety. I don't like having social anxiety, but the fear of social situations is even greater than my dislike of the disease, so things like exposure therapy are really hard for me to commit to.
@quietDime4559 definitely that can be hard, maybe you can try to find other different things that might help you more? :o but it's always hard to get out of your comfort zone for anything D: I wish you'll be able to overcome things soon ^-^ <3
I don't understand my struggle. I just want to feel normal. To be normal.
@KLM3278 aww *huggles* you are amazing just the way you are :D and I definitely understand the want to not have to struggle is so large, I really hope you can mange that soon <3
@KeananWillListen Thanks
Alot of people don't understand how hard it is with social anxiety to communicate and open up about it. I have social anxiety, and it has its ups and downs depending on the situation and the severity. I still have difficulty opening up to people about specific things and problems in my life. But what truly helps, is when you have surrounded yourself with kind, loving, understanding people.
@LovelyRaven9 definitely :o good thinknig :D things can be so so so bad, and people don't understand it's severity, but definitely having people close to you you can trust and feel good around is always a good starting point :D <3