Career guidance
I’m at a point in life where I don’t know what I want to do. One month into my “big girl job” and my mental health is deteriorating. My manager has messaged me early morning on the weekend. My anxiety is bad to the point where I feel like I can’t breath. I hate going to work. I want a job where it ends at work not have to work after leaving work too. I feel like a failure if I quit. Right now I’m applying to other jobs and hoping to get something soon.
thank you for coming to my midlife crisis Ted talk
@passionatePapaya2723
sometimes a job just in not the right fit ... in the case of a job that think you should be on all the time not just at work can be stressful ... on one hand you know you are not paid for those emails/ calls etc on your time but if others are doing it ... feels weird to be one standing up to " i am off the clock"
i hope you find something that will be a better fit ... and people who get a work /life balance is not answer calls on weekend etc.
I can understand your situation. I was in similar situation couple of years back. I kept working in same job and it messed up my mind. Its been 3-4 years since I switched my job but the depression is still there and its difficult to deal sometimes. I wish I had quit my job that time .
Sometimes quitting doesnt mean being a loser. Sometimes, it brave to leave a bad situation. Prioritise your mental health first, job is temporary.
@passionatePapaya2723 I know exactly how you feel. I tried out a new career and ended up in a role where I was completely overwhelmed, had a terrible boss, and cried most mornings knowing I didn't want to go... but I didn't want to be a quitter either. It got so bad that I did try to quit, but my bosses responded in a really positive way. They asked me how we could adjust my work environment to be more supportive. I was working in a very noisy, high-paced setting and they allowed me to use headphones and avoid distractions in order to get certain tasks done more efficiently and made other adjustments too. It may be that your job is not the right fit, but today's companies are more open to making adjustments for your work style (or neurodiverse) needs and it is worth talking to them about it.
Having said all that... boundaries are important to set (no calls on the weekend) and if you do leave this job, you'll have a better idea of what you're looking for in your next one!
@anonuser2023
I completely agree here - BOUNDARIES. They are the most important thing to have in any relationship, and especially a business relationship. Just because you get a business call doesn't mean you have to answer it on the weekend (unless you are actually supposed to work on the weekend) and all the emails can wait until Monday as well. When you are done on Friday, be done, walk away, and pick it back up Monday morning.
@passionatePapaya2723
There are a couple types of positions. Salary positions, where you work unlimited hours basically for the company for a set amount of pay is one type of position. Another position is hourly. When you work at a position which is hourly, you go to work for set hours and then when you are done work, you are off the clock.
It's okay to look for another position at another company that is more within your likes and needs. It's not failure or a big issue that there is the need for a change. Your mental health is more important than the position that you have currently. The good part of this is that you are seeing what kind of position you are having difficulty with - positions where you are on-call after hours.
That may change over time as well. As you grow and learn more skills with working and career choices, you may find that you enjoy being on-call. You may never enjoy it. But you will learn more about you, your needs and your wants.
Try to give yourself some kindness and grace as you make up your mind about what you need to do.
