Today my depression is at a...
On a scale of 1-10 with 10 being the worst, where would you rank your depression?
What is one thing you can do today to find some joy? Even if it is just for a moment?
8
Going to kill me
10/10. I just don't want to be here or simply be anymore. I am exhausted.
@Packita Do you still feel this way?
@Julietlovesu415 imcredibly, it is even worse. Lately, I am almost unaware that I am awake.
@Packita I wish I was unaware of the fact that I'm awake. The only way I'm getting through this is sleep.
@Julietlovesu415 i do the same. I sleep all day so that I don't have to be awake in this reality. If that makes any sense?
7.
Infinite. I skipped my therapy appointment today because I don
My depression, beast that it is, is at a 9, if 10 is the max. I'm just so tired and done. I mostly feel like I will never get better, and there's no one to talk to about it. My spouse isn't helpful and my only friends are going through their own grief right now. I can't even be there for them, though I tried.
@Amaruq I'm going through thst as well. It sucks to feel stuck and completely alone even though you know you aren't. I'd say if you want to talk message me but i dont think they jave personal messaging on here.
@Julietlovesu415
Thanks for your kind reply. I'm sorry you're also going through the same, it's difficult and tiring. This is a nice community but not quite enough, I think, now that I've been here for a short while and active on the various forums. But it's something, at least.
Honestly it's amazing I'm not dead, I couldnt kill myself on my dads birthday. I really wanted to do it on my birthday, ive always wanted to die the day i was born...odd life goal...but whats even more odd is i look forward to it.
My birthday was horrible. The weeks leading up to my birthday were horrible, this year has been horrible. Ive been at 10 all year.
I am absolutely, undoubtedly miserable and have zero passion for life anymore. I know have to force myself to like nature. I use to L.O.V.E nature no matter what.
I dont feel I can come back from this. If I can wait long enough maybe I will kill myself when Chester did.
For the longest time I kept myself from cutting so i self harmed in other ways, mostly not eating and as someone whos 4'10 and 85lbs thats actually dangerous. I also didnt learn how to tie a slipknot just so I wouldnt hang myself, I now really want to learn.
I am going to learn how to cut myself first. I dont think it will make me feel any better or release any tension, and I'm vain so I'd have to do it in a part of my body that I don't like; my theighs. I enjoy pain and blood so thats really not an issue for me.
@Julietlovesu415 Chester died on July 20th, I cant wait that long. Hmmm his birthday is March 20th which is the day after my brothers birthday, is that too fucked up? My brother is far from my biggest fan. That really could work, it gives a little over a month to get ready.
10/10. I've been just sitting and doing nothing as of late. Nothing really helps. I am usually fine while I am sleeping, but I have been having unpleasant dreams, so that doesn't even really help anymore. I feel like I'm being pretty dramatic.
@Sketch1 I'm going through the same thing. I feel like I just can not, and almost dont want to, get out of this slump.
@Julietlovesu415 Me too. It's not great, but the familiarity of the feeling is almost comfortable at this point.
At 1. Good number but I have to pick uo the pace for what I abandoned when I was low. Not good. Haha 🤭
I want to cry myself asleep and be dead when I wake up
