Time machine : stroll down memory lane ⏲️🕰️

@honestHickory7693 🤣

@honestHickory7693 don't you think it's a great idea 💡😉

Thank you, you not being shy and I guess even for those who are not shy as bad as I was when you go through certain things if forces you to look at things it forces you not only to look at what others did to you but what part of it did you contribute to the whole situation when I first heard that I contributed to my own abuse I took that hard to understand because I did not ask for it, but it was introduced to me, but how I look at it had my mother my stronger and say no not allowing me to get my way all the time. I understand that she too was abuse growing up, but it’s no excuse to allow your own child to take advantage within the home. You’re the parent you’re supposed to be the one to give the discipline and to say what can and cannot be done and she would allow it. All I had to do was ask two or three times and she would give in, but I think the fact that I listened you know when they’re certain things going on in the home, it should be reported if not by the adults then the child to the way I see it is that if the child is being hurt then go out and tell somebody but I was tough what goes on in the home stays in the home you tell nobody and it wasn’t my mother that talk that it was my stepfather mind you yes he was my stepfather, but my mother and him didn’t have no kind of a relationship, and the only reason that they were gonna get married was because my mom pretty much thought that’s what I wanted being that I wanted the father, but when they would go to bed, I would sleep right in the middle. I didn’t want them holding hands and that I’m manipulated the whole thing, but like when my children came into the picture, I knew that there was something about me that wasn’t right. I did not know what it was. I couldn’t put it put a finger on it, but I had to know something was wrong because the one thing that I taught my children was if they can’t come to me, and they feel that they cannot trust me for some reason or another. They were directed to go out whether it be a teacher or anyone and tell them what’s going on inside the home cause I didn’t want them to be hurt. I never intended it to happen, but I got so badly mentally ill that I just didn’t realize what I was doing. I just didn’t think I couldn’t think I couldn’t take care of myself no less take care of them. I love them. Yes that I did that. One thing I hated was when therapists would say you can’t love Anyone till you love yourself. But I was because of my love for them that kept me alive and I fought for my life, not just for me, but I felt it was something I had to do for my family