is it better for your mental-health to think about your feelings or not?

hello, I really need to hear some people's points of view.

is it better for your mental-health to think about your feelings or not?

this simple question I keep turning over and over in my head, it feels like an impossible paradox. On the one hand I notice I feel so much better when I don't think about my painful feelings and you could argue that means ''I'm getting over them'' right? But on the other hand I'm afraid I'm just suppressing instead of processing them and this way they will just keep following me.

everything I've learned about this in my life is so contradicting. I know the brain is made out of neural-pathways, the more a pathway is used the stronger it grows. By this logic ruminating on my feelings would just reinforce those thought patterns and give those thoughts more dominance in my brain, and likewise ignoring my feelings would then make me forget about them.

I totally believe you can train your mindset to be more positive, just by not dwelling in your negative emotions. likewise you can also make yourself miserable by not letting go of these emotions.

however, it is generally believed you shouldn't repress emotions and that the best way to process them is to express them. But how do I know this is true? I never really talk about any negative feelings I have, but the times I kind-of did actually made me feel worse. (despite people reacting kindly).

from experience I just know I feel better when I only focus on the positive, but I'm just afraid if I ignore my painful feelings that they'll haunt me. so, how do I improve my mental-health? Doing what makes me happy or ruminating my stupid feelings, which btw feels like willingly trowing myself in an endless downwards spiral.

thanks for listening to me complaining.