Reflection ✨

I think it’s going to rain all week 

Mornings are tough. I can feel the adrenaline surge through my body. I don’t know if it’s yelling “breakfast time!!!” 🤔 but I do feel better after I eat. 

I’ve actually come a long way. There were moments when I couldn’t even get out of bed. I found out I had low vitamins/minerals through blood work. I’m on them now. It’s been about a week or 2. 

Today just feels weird. Maybe it’s because I haven’t worked in a few days. I went to work for 2 weeks straight because of orientation and now the lull. I’m keep telling my body “it’s ok, you’re safe, it’s an adjustment period.” I found a new job because I thought my previous one was no good for me. And I did leave with a no call no show because I felt it was just physically impossible. The truth is it was too early still for me to go back. Something I never would have done (due to shame) is what I did! I emailed them an apology. Do you know how loving and courageous I feel. 💕 I also followed up with a phone call!!! Who am I ? I’m an improved peach 🍑 ❤️

I’ve reached out to healthy people I love and love me. Because there was a piece of me that didn’t think people did or that I deserved love. 💗 It’s been emotional but I think mostly happy tears. 🥹  The ones that are toxic, if they come up in my mind, I “send” them love from my heart. 

I’m hopeful I can return to my previous job. I love my co workers so much there. They were so supportive before, during and after my surgery. They are consistent. 

I didn’t have control over the surgery. It was hurry up and go. But I told little peachy today, “It’s ok, we got through it together, and we are going to keep moving forward” There wasn’t much I could do as a child, nothing was in my control. But I have control today of the decisions I make and the people I allow in my life. ❤️❤️