[TW] Emo’s little emotional corner 🥲
Possible trigger warnings: death, sh
read at your own risk I guess
🥲 I know this month isn’t as bad as last month, but I still feel so awful. I know I have been sh free for 3 months but as the days go by some are getting harder and harder not to go back to old habits, UnU I wish my nana was still around. ☹️ I miss her so much 😢 ever since she passed away my mental health was never the same, it got so bad and it’s better now but my depression is terrible.. some days I feel like I’m falling deeper into the hole of depression while climbing out at the same time. 😢 and here’s me complaining about headaches when I literally do nothing about them. 🥲 what I learnt from today is try not to laugh lots with a headache as it makes it worse. I’m also sad today ☹️ I graduate high school soon and lose a whole network of irl support ☹️ so sad
@emotionalTalker2260
Oh no! That's terrible. Just know that you have all of us to help you with this. We can help you climb out of you depressive state it may take time, but it will work. Laughter and talking about your problems are the best medicine ever!!
@ilovecats224
thanks you (: I wish it was just easy to be able to throw my problems into a bin to never be seen again. But it isn’t that easy. And yeah, I’d rather laugh over things then cry about it. Which sadly makes people think I’m a happy okay person. Hope you’re good (:
@emotionalTalker2260 Hey you ❤️ How are you? How those wisdom teeth? I'm sorry it's been so long since I checked in on you 😞 I hope you're doing ok *leaves hugs*
@mytwistedsoul
Heya, wisdom teeth are calm again, they aren't bothering me. I'm not doing real good Rn either. Just exhausted. My psych is agreeing with me on the chances that I have at least OSDD and they made me do the DID screening test and yeah of course it was a high score (83.6) 😐 but I'm not good as I feel like they're making me find out about everything. I don't want to remember. I'm also sick Rn because of over 5 breakdowns within 12 hours, 4 at night and I always get sick with night time breakdowns ☹️
How are yous, and it's okay I knew yous would eventually check in 🥺💖 love y'all platonically
@emotionalTalker2260 I'm glad your wisdom teeth have calmed down. I'm sorry to hear about everything else going on though. It seems like with some answers come other "issues". The more we try to get in a better mental health state the more things we uncover and the memories can really really be hard to handle. Are you ok with the psych confirming it? Like now it's a definite yes? I'm really sorry to hear about the breakdowns. Night time always seems to be the time things are the hardest. Is there anything that helps? Can you feel they're coming on or do they just happen? And sick on top of it :( really doesn't help at all
I'm hanging in there best I can right now. *sending you lots of strength and good vibes* sending love back to you EmosaurusRex ❤️
@mytwistedsoul
Sorry I took so long to respond. Just been so busy and lost lately. Yeah I think my psych is giving a yes. And my wisdom teeth have calmed down yet again. They're just annoying.
How are yous 💖
@emotionalTalker2260 Aww that's ok. ❤️ It's been the same here. I get lost so easy lately and the time just poofs away :/ You might need to think about getting those teeth taken out so they stop giving you grief. But God the dentist is expensive!
How am I? Well - TW ok?
I just lost my dogon Saturday. She was old and in decline. She was 14/15. There's a couple anniversaries coming up. And the father I reconnected with not too long ago doesn't have long. Tbh - some days it's like I'm barely holding this mess together. Sorry that's probably tmi but thank you for asking ❤️
@mytwistedsoul
Aww soul. I'm really really sorry to hear 🥺💖 -big bear hugs for you- it's really hard to lose loved beings and see others fade in front of you. Been there done that. And it hurts so much. Sending you lots of love and strength 🥺💖💖💖
*peeks* emosaurussssss 💖💖 its been so longgggggggg
@selflessSpruce1515
Miss ya buddy 💖
@emotionalTalker2260
booooooo😮 you didn't see it coming....tis a huggiee attacc for emo talkerrr🤗🤗🤗
@Optimisticempath
omgeeeee pathhhhh *tackle hugs back* I miss you heaps ☹️💖
@emotionalTalker2260 me missie you too 🥺 hows you been?💖💖 huggieee youuuussss
ive been v absent lol...idk some people call it isolation to make it sound fancy ...again..idk 💀
@emotionalTalker2260 Hey you :) How are you? I've been lousy at keeping touch. I'm so sorry. I've been a little overwhelmed with too much everything and nothing.
Thank you for your kind words in your last reply ❤️
@mytwistedsoul @Optimisticempath
🫢 I guess a few of us are a lil slack with things (me too me too 😭). And yeah I've just decided to tag you both to respond to your questions 💖
To be honest, I'm absolutely terrible. I'm finding myself, but I'm not feeling real good at the same time either. So I guess I'm okay. Idk xD
How are you two lovely beans? 💖🫶
And soul, I'll always leave kind words behind :D 💖 you're cared about and loved, and I hope you know that. (Also you too path, you're loved and cared about as well ^-^)
@emotionalTalker2260 Time just seems to get away. I'm not sure where it goes but it just - poofs
@mytwistedsoul
those words really are true, I guess its the miserable power of denial, like you bs yourself to believe everything is okay, but in reality your feelings are just a ticking time bomb :(
Hope you're ok <3
I'm popping in to wish you a very Merry Christmas, Emo!
@GoldenNest2727
Awww, merry belated christmas to you too nest ༼ つ ◕_◕ ༽つ💖
I hate everything. I hate everything. I hate everything. I hate everything. I just *** hate every *** thing that's wrong with me. I hate how stupid my life has been so far, I hate the *** heat at the moment. It's so hot as soon as you walk out of aircon you just want to throw up. Too *** hot. I'm not coping and I'm barely dealing with everything. I can't. I just can't. Too. Hot. And I hate January. Yesterday was my big stupid anniversary day. I hate myself right now-
@emotionalTalker2260 *sits with Emo* I wish I had the right words. 😞 I know anniversaries have the ability to bring up some really big feelings and we feel raw as a result
@mytwistedsoul
Soulll 🥺💖 -hugs- I wish it was cold here. I'm not dealing when much of the summer well this year. It's ridiculous lately 😫 it's like the whole country is an oven-
@emotionalTalker2260 It sounds kind of horrible that it's so hot there. I mean I prefer warmer weather but not hot hot. Will it start to cool off soon? This is a picture from about a week ago - wish I could send you some cooler weather ❤️
@mytwistedsoul
:0 snowwwwwwwwwww! It looks so so so pretty!
@emotionalTalker2260 That's the lane to my house 😂 takes a while to clean it. If you zoom in you can see deer tracks on it too 😊 I probably asked before but does it snow there?
@mytwistedsoul
No snow in qld. And aww cutie deers!
Really lost at the moment. I don't believe my meds are working anymore. I keep having breakdowns and I accidentally spent 4 hours on a cold floor yesterday and I could not get myself up, all my limbs felt so heavy. I also spent a good hour within the 4 crying. Well I guess lucky for that patch, it'll be nice and clean now..
@emotionalTalker2260 Hey Emo ❤️ *offers safe hugs* I'm sorry things are so rough for you right now 😞 Do you know if there's anything contributing to it - triggers or anything like that? Four hours on the cold floor would be horrible. Can you make an appointment with whoever prescribes your meds? They might need to adjust them for you
@mytwistedsoul
- hugs- I'm not sure what triggered the episode ☹️ like I couldn't get up by myself. At all. And yeah, I'll be making a doc appointment soon about them
@emotionalTalker2260 It sounds scary 😟 How are you feeling now? I hope the doctor can sort things out and get you feeling better. Try to rest when you can and just take it easy. Kind of like if you had the flu or a cold. No pressure or anything but keep me posted? ❤️
@mytwistedsoul
I'm scared a lot lately. Like I'm constantly in the clouds and I keep breaking down. Nothing makes sense right now at all. I don't know what im doing. Hope you're okies though 🥺💖
@emotionalTalker2260 Feeling scared all the time is horrible 😞 Does it help if you remind yourself that you're safe? It used to happen for me more often than it has been lately but it still happens and I'm not really sure what sets it off - its frustrating. I hope you can find something to ease this feeling and that things settle down - even just a little bit helps
I know it’s been a really long time since we’ve even really been on here properly..
we’re still around, I would say we’re doing well but I think splitting over 15 times due to working in a packing shed doesn’t exactly count as well.
But yeah, as a total we aren’t far off from 100 parts all up that we know of, but there’s estimated 55-65 alters and over 20 shards and fragments. Because of the numbers, loss and stress, there’s been quite a few main host changes. Technically the one we had whom was chronically online here (who’s next to me right now as we’re typing this) was dormant, still on a big hiatus. I (bug boi) was also dormant at one stage and came back with a subsystem. So it seems like our brain is starting to put shards into (figure of speech) folders.
I also feel pretty bad because we accidentally triggered a bunch of hosts (including the main one) last night as we watched the midnight fireworks to celebrate the new year. I didn’t know they would have found it triggering. Last time I knew, the body loved fireworks. So we accidentally shutdown in public, but, I’m glad we have a safe place we can go to, to ask for help, a chat or even somewhere where we can have floor time that isn’t frowned upon (as laying in public is illegal here). We’re still keeping an eye out for a potential introject of a song as we felt a split headache while we were heavily dissociated.
also: we’ve been radio silent due to pain levels with hEDS & Wisdom Teeth. 6 wisdom teeth is too much, it hurts.. so much.
But yeah, we’re okay, we’re still here and we are sorry for the silence there has been