Breakup trauma - feel like I screwed up my opportunity to heal and have made things worse
I went through a traumatic breakup last year, there was a breach of trust which had a devestating impact on the relationship and led to us breaking up. We still love each other but being together is too hard and makes things worse for both of us.
A little while after the breakup, I felt I was starting to move on although unrelated to the breakup I was in a very bad state from something else which happened and called my ex out of desperation for support. This led to a series of events that would inflict more trauma onto both of us and reopened wounds we’d been healing.
We cut contact and then recently the same thing happened again, making things even worse.
We spoke on the phone recently to close the door one more and final time which was very painful. We both miss and love each other so much but we can’t be together. I’m worried I’ve made things worse for her healing process and has definitely impacted mine. I feel like we’re both going to struggle moving on from everything and I don’t know the best way forward.
@yuizyu
I think we are often best friends with someone in a relationship..... once the romantic aspect is damaged we still want or need a friend...... i think many times we reach back to a familar friend and yes opening old wounds again and again complicates the the healing .........
just like an open wound keep picking at a scab it will scar.
I think this will definitely take time to heal from. And I’m sorry. But let yourself feel these feelings, cry until you can’t no more and then focus on yourself on how you can make yourself happy and become a stronger person. Think of where you want to be in a few months from now, in what state of mind you would like to be in. At least that’s what has helped me.