How come one day, he doesn't want to be with me anymore.
We broke up two months ago, he said that he's so confused and lost and that he wants to be alone and he wanted to try to find that happiness without depending on me. I thought we're good, we did not fight or anything. I just began to notice it when he started to get cold. When we finally got the chance to meet again in person, i thought we're gonna try to catch things up but he started to say all those things to me and that he wanted to break up with me. He said that there's no one else and I actually believe him(my instinct says so). I have no choice but to just let him go. I love him so much that all I want is for him to be happy. But now, still... It feels like hell, painful, confusing, lonely. I kept questioning and wondering everything even when we got a decent closure and talk things out. How ironic that his last words to me is "I love you". I'm wondering everyday if he's still thinking about me or is he experiencing the pain that I'm feeling. Right now, i'm still checking up on him if he's online on his social media and even check what he's watching in our Netflix account! I guess I just really feel miserable right now, writing this and crying at 3am in the morning. Maybe what I'm so sure right now is that Everything happens for a reason, i just don't know yet what it is.
Thank you Moongirl,SadPotato,KindLemon. I really appreciate the kind words. Here's the thing, we're working in the same company. I got the chance earlier to have a meeting with him included. When we're in the meeting room just me and him. I tried to say "Hi". Not that I really wanted to have a conversation with but you know the courtesy and for us to not feel awkward with each other. BUT HE DIDN'T RESPOND. And now I feel awful and pathetic. Its like he's more bitter than I am when I was the one who has been left. I'm just trying to make it easier for both of us being in the same place but I don't know why is he acting that way. I don't know if he did not still moved on or he just badly wants to cut all the ties that I have with him. It just really hurts on my end, I feel being rejected all over again.
@friendlyBlanket2910 I'm so sorry dear, I've been in similar shoes, it's been long and I'm still hurt. At some point I began to learn that it had nothing to do with me, that no matter how I was, he would've ended it anyway, because he wasn't really in love like he thought/claimed he was. And it's as simple as that.
I'm sorry to if I'm drooping this like a bomb, but I wanna save you time and energy. I know our stories and circumstances aren't 100% identical, but the core and morals are the same.
I'm sorry he was this rude to you that day in the meeting room.
@friendlyBlanket2910 Yeah, i feel you, maybe he acted like that Because of he still hurt, and hurt people hurt other. For now just try to focus on you . Yes rejection feels so bad i am feeling the same way, everytime i Remember my ex, but now i am telling myself if someone is the one he wont let you go nd wont let go what you had build together go, i agree with the other comment please, dear save your time start focusing on you its not easy to do but its worthy.
You can do it and you are stronger than you think🤗
@friendlyBlanket2910
I wish I could give you a HUGE hug right now. I know the feeling. I've been through my own break ups before and they really suck. Everything you're feeling right now is normal and valid and I hope you're taking the time to be gentle with yourself and allowing yourself to feel all those emotions, no matter how crappy it may feel in the meantime. There is no fast-forward from all this. From my own experience, pushing myself to move on quickly from my ex only made the feelings worse. It will take time, for sure, but you will be okay.
I think for now, the best thing you can do is do what's best for yourself, not him. I understand that you may still love him and care for him, but I hope you don't neglect yourself too. You are so worthy of being loved and I would be sad to see you continuously give your love to someone who doesn't reciprocate or even appreciate it.
Through this healing time, please take care and be patient with yourself <3
And oh, if you ever need to chat with someone or have someone listen, feel free to send me a message too!